For those of you who write me asking about my progress toward securing my own yacht, thank you for asking. The number of years remaining until my downpayment is assembled remains high, though when measured in centuries it seems much more doable. Once I’ve obtained my water craft, you can bet I’m going to be hosting parties onboard the likes that attract Cara Delevingne, Kendall Jenner, and Adriana Lima to party like it’s 1999, though I’m not sure these girls were even born then.
Yacht parties are all the rage in the South of France during May when models and celebrities and thespianics all gather to check each other out and compete in perhaps the world’s most cloying of cat fights. And much of it takes place at sea. Who will score the top girls for their forecastle? What hottie will get wasted enough to fall into the water requiring assistance? Who will be found in the morning in the lower bunks with some guy not me? These are the questions being asked. I really don’t want to answer until I have a boat of my own and can yell out things like, ‘Herbert, bring some champagne to Ms. Lima, she’s empty.’ Enjoy.
Oh, holy Friday. Most blessed of the days named after the gods I can’t remember. You tease us with the anticipation of the weekend, yet, you are technically a work day and also the most common day for me to be fired based on my work history. Huh. I hadn’t thought of that before. Nevertheless, nothing can reduce the glow I feel merely circling the Reader Finds email bag each week. That blessed velvet satchel of celebrity skin goodness just waiting to be unveiled. It’s part skin-filled goodness, part joy of giving. Something sacred, something profane.
This week’s Reader Finds includes Cara Delevingne in nothing but a towel (thank you kindly to EgoReader ‘Zed’), Andrea Lowell topelss in skinematic excellence (much kudos to ‘Jayne’), Carmen Electra pokey and topless onscreen (Carmen in prime form via ‘Owen’), Charlotte McKinney major league curves (wowzers provided by ‘Dennis E.’), a double dose of super hottie Cora Keegan (double lust filled by ‘Emmet’), a purported picture of Emily Ratajkowski topless (from our good buddy ‘Anon’), boobtastic faptastic Helen Flanagan in a bikini top (lovely lusciousness from ‘Stephen T.’), Jehane Paris topless goodness (dedicatedly dropped off by ‘Bob J.’), a young Jennifer Jason Leigh quite topless (throwback funbags via ‘Hampton’), Kate Compton and Yara Khmidan topless modeling pics (spotted by ‘Wheels’), Kate Winslet topless in early film role (double blessings from ‘Mikey’), Kendall Jenner nip slip from GQ (caught by too many of you to count, thanks all), Linda Hamilton topless during her Terminator days (sights provided by ‘Daryn’), a double dose of Mary Steenburgen without clothes (strange but sweet pics via ‘Desmond’), Miranda Kerr arm bra goodness (hottie alert caused by ‘David’), Nikki Cox self-shared cleave (thank you kindly to ‘Sage’), Nina Agdal bikini shots for SI (Danish wonderments via ‘Allie’), Rita Ora nip slip peeks (from the mind of another ‘Bill’), Sherilyn Fenn in and out of a bikini (wonders of the past so sweet from ‘Travis’), and Tinashe nip slip in concert (dropped off by ‘Doo Doo’). It’s a handful of hotness. Two scoops. Use all limbs available. Enjoy.
Oh, you crazy Jenner girls, and Kardashian girls, and Cara Delevingne, how you do love to get noticed when you hit the town and the hotspots and all the places I’m sure are bars but somehow still let teen celebrity girls carouse provided they are dressed much older.
Kylie Jenner in a pair of shorts so tight they might get everybody arrested led the pack, along with model sister Kendall Jenner showing off her long model legs, Khloe Kardashian flashing her Funions to the greatest extent possible, and Cara Delevingne just looking fashionably hot and waiting to see what girl she’d be taking home tonight. This gaggle of girls is quite different from the motley crew I typically hit the town with. For one, the Kardashians rolls with much greater skin shows. Also, a pack of paparazzi ten deep and ten wide. They’re like a rolling Vegas revue. Legs, buns, ta-ta’s, it’s all there in a line. You simply can’t miss this show. Enjoy.
I got so many positive responses last week to my little bit about what I was watching online on a Sunday evening, I decided to give you my list again. Granted, the bulk of that positive response came in emails from my Uncle Steve followed by, can you help me out with a few bucks, but I like to think his compliments were independently valid. I like sharing. It makes me feel like I’m part of a global campaign to help people see more hot women. If the UN had any legitimacy, I would already be named an ambassador.
As to what I’ve been watching the past several hours, well, how about Candice Swanepoel oiled and glittery booty, Beyonce bikini body hot in her Standing on the Sun video, Stephanie Pratt showing off like a naughty schoolgirl for the Brits, and Doutzen Kroes teasing in black lingerie and stockings. As you can tell, my tastes are diverse. I invite you to share in my virtual playlist. Enjoy.
We saw the one promo picture of these three see-through nymph models earlier this week. Why not end the week peeking into the full Vogue spread of the next generation of hot British supermodels. The early 20′s something Suki Waterhouse, Cara Delevingne, and Georgia May Jagger. All British blue bloods in their own right. All extremely good looking sextastic young models who designers are choosing to pimp their shmata on the runways of Europe. What does it all mean? I’m not sure, I just know I like looking.
Some day I’ll have my own fashion magazine and get trios of alluring nubiles half-nekkid for shoots in my studio. Of course, the models and their agents might wonder why the magazine never seems to print any issues. I’ll remind them it’s mostly Free Standing Inserts into newspapers in small Eastern European towns. Also, those I keep for my personal use. Still, not a bad circulation for 2015. Oh, bring on the lovelies! Enjoy.
Every now and then a photo comes along that reminds me of why I got into the business of naughty day dreaming. This new teaser for Vogue featuring young models Suki Waterhouse, Cara Delevingne, and Georgia May Jagger is just one of those photos. From the gap teethed down the nekkid covered bodies to the fuzzy heels, there’s nothing about this picture that I don’t absolutely endorse. Well, perhaps the fact that Cara’s taken my place. But, being a semi-realistic dreamer, I can live with the fact that this show is going to mostly be about watching. Girls, you have no idea how big I tip, provided you’re not good at converting U.S. dollars in your noggins. So desperately hot. Please, don’t stop. Enjoy.
Cara Delevingne really is on top of the world these days. Big time modeling gigs for this already famous heiress. Not to mention she seems to be scoring young chicks faster that Leo DiCaprio and Bradley Cooper combined. Why not let the world in on your contentment in a short dress and some sexy boots even in the London winter. It’s cold over there, but our ogling hearts do need warming, and a sextastic young woman in boots always toast my personal cockles.
Cara was on her way to being featured in the Burberry fashion show. I believe I can afford one finger of one glove being featured at the event. I know which finger I’d put it on too. But leering doesn’t cost a thing. I’m not sure if this was truly a benevolent gift or a mere fashion statement, Cara. I’ve decided I don’t really need to know. Enjoy.