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Battle Total Douche: Shia Le Beouf In His ‘Leave Me Alone’ Beard vs. Shirtless Drunken Justin Bieber Swagger Coach Pulled Out of a Sports Bar

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bill-swift - March 13, 2012

It's kind of a common thing for certain well-known, veteran actors, to find middle age and tire of their fandom and girls screaming for them and the whole Hollywood circus and they suddenly shy from the limelight, move off to remoter homes, grows scruffy beards, start getting kind of off-the-grid crazy. Steve McQueen and Marlon Brando come to mind. Now add to that list Shia LeBeouf, who in his few short self-important years in Hollywood made famous by his role in Transformers, has already seen fit to go on tons of benders, get in bar fights, throw coffee at paparazzi disturbing him whilst writing in his private journals, and, now, finally going incognito with the McQueen beard.

Two words immediately come to mind: total douche.

Granted, Shia is the perennial winner of this type of battle, but then you've probably still not heard of Ryan Goode. Ryan is a young dude who somehow knew the Usher and Scooter Braun crew who invented Justin Bieber, which alone should merit the death penalty. Because Ryan is such a super cool awesome dude, he was hired by management to teach Justin how to 'get his swagger on', following the midget teen pop singer everywhere, showing how to be super friggin' righteously cool. Not to mention which gang signs a teen boy from Canada should be flashing to represent. Ryan got so close with Justin, he even got to start dating Selena Gomez's girlfriend actress Ashley Benson, the foursome spending this past weekend at a sports bar in Tampa where Ryan eventually got shoved out, obviously drunk, shirtless, and still eating handfuls of fries.

Four words come to mid: total utter swagger douche.

But, as always, you be the judge.

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