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Taylor Swift Has New Tits and a Tumblr Account

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Lex Jurgen - September 16, 2014


The lingering utility of social media is for radicalized Islamic terrorists to recruit disaffected Muslim teens and for young girls to get a chance to pretend Taylor Swift give a shit about them. Other than that, it's trolls and Michelle Obama telling you to eat your vegetables like a Mr. T reboot. Taylor Swift has just moved onto Tumblr to symbolize the ultimate pointlessness of that social media network as well. She's pretending she doesn't have a sizable publicity and media team that runs her social blog. She's asking her fans a bunch of basic questions on how to set up her Tumblr page. And, tens of thousands are responding, because the eleven year old C-student mind is still oblivious to the commercial ruse.

It wouldn't surprise me to learn that Taylor Swift does spend many of her late evenings on her laptop cruising around the Internet. But she's not building her professional looking Tumblr blog. She's trolling the accounts of her burn list and ex-boyfriends writing about how they're assholes who have V.D. Also, ordering personalized cock-shaped cookies for her girlfriends so they can giggle.

Photo Credit: Splash

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