bill-swift - May 9, 2014
It's right there on the first page of Ogling for Dummies: these mystical â€˜women' creatures can be quite arousing. Y'know, with their skimpy swimwear and its failure to conceal their delightful fleshtastic and all. You know this, we know this, that pervy old dude at the back of the bus in the disturbingly bulgy cycling shorts definitely knows this (our eyes! They burn!).
Shock freaking horror, some unscrupulous advertising guys use this fact to make us buy stuff (oh yes indeed, we're just as outraged as you are). Stuff-buying, after all, is kind of a big deal to these bastards, and they aren't above thrusting a nipple or two in our faces to facilitate this. Games do it too, and Super Galdelic Hour is one of the worst bosomy culprits.
Which isn't all that surprising, when you consider that â€˜galdelic' is French for big ol' tits everywhere. Except it isn't, but at this point it may as well be.
So, anywho, on to the business of the day. Super Galdelic Hour is a uniquely Japanese slice of weirdness from Enix (pre Square merger), which hit the PS2 in 2001. It's a gameshow-esque collection of minigames, in which the contestants are all buxom ladies in... well, the indescribable outfits you see above. It's a recipe for weirdness, chestal wobble-age and all-round essential entertainment.
Needless to say, said ladies are built from the Dead or Alive mold. What you're seeing here is a kind of top-heavy, pervtastic Teletubbies. The presentation is, musically, visually and everything-effing-elseily, far too cutesy and candy coated. It would probably start to rot your teeth if you looked directly at it for a prolonged period. But you shouldn't do so anyway, lest you start to feel very, very dirty.
We've all had that dream where brightly-colored freakish animals transform into scantily clad women. Of course we have. Sometimes, they'll proceed to play whack-a-mole, or some kind of gladiator battle using only their asses (yep, check and check). Never, though, has a video game allowed us to play through all the ogley weirdness in our subconscious. Not until Super Galdelic Hour.
Check it out in action below, if you dare.