Kanye West Posts:

Egotastic! Doll House Theater: Kim and Kanye Are Having a Baby! (VIDEO)

Kim and Kanye Are Having a Bastard Baby, Rejoice!

Well, don't you know, the blessed announcement of Kim Kardashian's illegitimate child has inspired our own Jack Tomas to retrieve his dolls from the disturbingly moist box that is their safekeep beneath his bed to dramatically re-create the moment at which Kanye West learned that has sired a bastard baby deep in the woman parts of Kim Kardashian.

Things we're not all flowers and trumpets from the get-go, as you shall see....

Kanye Used to Watch Ray-J Bumping Kim Kardashian When With Other Women

This is perhaps our favorite story, well, ever. It combines so much wrongness that it's just incredibly right.

According to our friends at TMZ, Kanye used to watch the Kim Kardashian and Ray-J sex tape when with other women to get him in the erectile animal mood. Hence began his quest to get the real Kim Kardashian, porn star, into his real bedroom.

Mission accomplished, you sad sad fool.

(Of course, you can still see the entire Kim Kardashian sex tape at  KimKSuperstar.com)

Kim Kardashian Leaving Kanye West’s House After a Thorough Banging and Color Coordination

Here's the bottomline. I don't care if you're a pretty bad-as rapper who has knocked boots with tons of hot ladies and you've got the manly trophies running up and down the mantle of your mansions, you simply can not decide it's a good idea to color coordinate outfits with your girlfriend. It's chick behavior and I'm standing quite firm on that point. So, Kanye West, you lose many many points.

As for Kim Kardashian and her hourglass curves coming out of Kanye's house in the morning, well, the woman does put on an S-shaped show that makes you wish it was your front door she was exiting with a funny walk in the morning. I'd still rather self-immolate myself in the streets that wear matching outfits with my girlfriend, but for one night of slap and tickle with that Kardashian badonkadonk, I'd max out my credit cards (though not sure my limit meets Kim's bare bones pricing). Enjoy.

Kim Kardashian Shows Off Her Ta’s and Her Latest True Love at The Lakers Game

Look, I know many people don't believe it, but this time, I think Kim Kardashian has finally found true love. Sometimes you've got to kiss or be peed on by a bunch of frogs before your find your true prince, as Kim has in rapper Kanye West. I don't see any reason why this romance can't last a full year, or fifteen million dollars, whichever occurs first. That is true love, Kardashian style.

But, to our benefit, Kim was flashing some deep cleavage at the already exciting Lakers playoff series game 7 over the weekend, adding a nice bit of one of the few things we do admire about Kim, to one of the few things we like about Kanye, his ability to score Laker's courtside seats. Maybe it really is a match made in heaven? Enjoy.

 

Kanye West Checks Out His Side of the Kardashian Bargain

Tale as old as time
Song as old as rhyme

What is Kim Kardashian after? Well, fame, fortune, the fantastic life. Everything that life promised to her by talent of looking pretty hot and being on the right sex tape at the right time. But what about these high-profile rappers and athletes she keeps publicly romancing, what's their end of the bargain?

Well, it's as old-school as human sex education itself. And Kanye West, the latest fish in the Kardashian fry, got a good long stare at it as he took Kim back to his apartment for the night after a paparazzi laden evening out on the town in New York.

Tail as old as time.

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EXPLICIT CONTENT WARNING: Purported Amber Rose Leaked Diddling Pictures

 

PLEASE BE ABLE TO HANDLE THE SIGHT OF WOMEN'S BODIES IF YOU CLICK INSIDE TO SEE THE VERY FULL AMBER ROSE PETALS

No, boobs and butts are not explicit content. Not in our world. Maybe in the world of the FCC and the handwringers and lamenting class who find the human body to be chock full of sin (which, of course, it is when it's at its best), but, Amber Rose plucking her own body banjo? Yep, that's explicit, and, well, being the purveyors of 'sexy celebrity', a must carry. Not quite sure the origin of these self-published photos purported to be the model and former Kanye West girlfriend and former, oh, probably lots of other things she's not so proud of, but MediaTakeOut has ink-splashed their moniker all over the photos so that's probably a good start if you're into investigating sources. Enjoy.

Rihanna Awe-Inspiring Hotness in %u2018All of the Lights%u2019 Hi-Res Redux

Big time shoutout to Egotastic! Superfan and all around Dutch dude, 'Felix E.' for sending us some startlingly high quality re-re-redo's of the sultry and boobtastic Rihanna from the Kanye West 'All of the Lights' music video. When we originally saw these still in lower quality, we were still awed by how amazing Rihanna looked for leering delights, but, now, seeing these high res redux, wow. I mean, wow. This may be the best we've ever seen Rihanna, and we've seen a whole lot of hotness from the Barbadian diva these past couple of years. Lust inducing factor times bazillion. And, blastoff. Enjoy.