Harper’s Bazaar

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Topless Covered for Harper’s

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley has been simply crazy hot for as long as I can remember. She’s only 27, which says both something about my memory, but also just how profound an impact Rosie has had on our collective private time happy time moments these past five or six years with her simple outlandish visual-hormonal appeal. She doesn’t really do more than appear incredibly feminine and sextastic in barely there clothing for ads and magazines and portfolios. And that is more than enough.

The current month’s issue of Harper’s Bazaar features Rosie covering her sweet tender peaches in various loose fitting wardrobes around the pool. Just to sort of remind you how hotel vacations look in the libido portion of your mind. The idea of sharing a king size poolside room with Rosie Huntington-Whiteley for the weekend provides more than a mere tingle. I can actually feel the burn and the soreness and a bit of the chaffing that might occur. She’s a stunner. Always has been and I mightily suspect always will be. Once I dropkick Jason Statham, I’m going to close the deal. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Miguel Reveriego For Harper’s Bazaar

Doutzen Kroes Hot Lingerie Prepping for the Victoria’s Secret Show

Every year the good and decent silk and lace making folks at Victoria’s Secret pimp their annual runway show for CBS just a little bit harder. More promos, more commercials, more hotness the likes of Doutzen Kroes showing off some of her fitting photos backstage prepping for the event in Harper’s Bazaar magazine.

Now, I’d be lying if I said the annual fashion show itself isn’t a bit PG-rated compared to even your typical catalog shoot. It is an all-audience type event, meaning, even less skin than normal. However, any time you get the world’s hottest women by the gaggle full into one location to pimp panties and bras, well, there is likely to be some delicious treats in store. As in the case of Doutzen Kroes, one crazy underrated angel MILFtastic. How I’d like to be her official dresser slash undresser for this event. I would do one of those tasks slowly, one rather quick. Enjoy.

Miranda Kerr Let Me Be Your Baby Daddy

Damn, Miranda Kerr is a good looking woman. Now that what’s his face is out of the picture, I really do believe it’s time for me to step in and provide my be fruitful and multiply skills to this woman for whom the entire planet would benefit from extensive offspring creation. The world only gets better looking if the good looking people like Miranda, and obviously me, start making many babies. Somebody’s got to compete with all the, what I like to call, ‘lessers’, who are humping like rabbits when the lighting gets less severe in the evenings.

Featured in the new edition of Harper’s Bazaar UK, Miranda shows exactly why if you lived with her, every time she popped out of her dressing room to ask you if she looked good in her outfit, you’d probably end up having sex. She always looks good in her outfit. Or not outfit. Damn, Miranda, call me now and let’s get to doing our part to keeping this planet blue and beautiful. Enjoy.

Stephanie Seymour Gets Down and Dirty in Lingerie With Her Two Fortunate Sons

You know what they say, the family that models provocatively together in black lace and leather is the family that stays together. Specifically stays together in winter cabins trapped in the snow with nothing to keep themselves warm save for the bare heat of their taboo desires. But, I’m quite sure that wasn’t entire discussed in this HarpersBazaar.com photoshoot featuring the wicked veteran naughty model Stephanie Seymour and her two growing boys.

Now, we typically do not ever feature the less fair and less interesting gender on this website, but this seemed like a rare enough occasion for the kids to stay in the picture. After all, you don’t want to come between Mama Bear Stephanie and her cubs. I mean, unless you’re properly lubed and gloved. It can get kind of familial in those tight quarters. Stephanie looks like a million damn dollars in these racy photos; her boys look super fortunate and in need of maybe some counseling. But mostly just fortunate. Enjoy.

Miley Cyrus Showing Off Legs for Harper’s

Say what you will about her short questionable hair style and that omnipresent bright red lipstick against the bleached white teeth, but one thing you can not take away from the new all grown up Miley Cyrus is her lean tight body she’s been working on hard the last couple of years. And that would most definitely include her toned legs, the ones she’s flashing heartily in the new edition of Harper’s Bazaar.

Now, you may not be a leg man such as myself (also a breast man, back man, neck man, ass man, midriff man, and oh, those damn hot ear lobes on the ladies), but you have to respect the gams on any girl who does Pilates as often as Miley, quit some of the poorer foods in her diet, and is more than happy to show skin. Respect. And, ogle. A gentlemanly tandem. Enjoy.

Samantha Gradoville Topless For Farm Girls Gone Global Hotness

Samantha Gradoville Topless in Harper's Bazaar Spain June 2013
Click to See Uncensored

Granted, I have no idea if Samantha Gradoville grew up on a farm in her Nebraska upbringings. I’m just so happy to bring you a girl from the heartland who’s making it big in the international magazine and modeling circuits, and, who, by the way, has a fantastic pair of chest puppies on display in Harper’s Bazaar Spain this month.

Now, you don’t care so much about high fashion or art or makeup. I mean, if you’re like me. But seeing Samantha flash her full upper frontals, well that’s worth a trip to the Spanish women’s magazine section of your local drugstore. Homegirl does good. Enjoy.

EgoRapidResponse: Bambi Northwood Topless in Harper’s Bazaar Australia

Bambi Northwood Topless in Harper's Bazaar Australia
Click to See Uncensored

We have an unusually fond affection for our readers at Egotastic!, in the way only a man can love another man, like Viking type shit. And while the love flows freely, we definitely like certain readers better. EgoReaders like ‘Dennis’ who upon hearing our affection for the newly discovered Bambi Northwood just this morning, shot us over some deliciously topless pictures of our new object d’ lust from Harpers Bazaar Australia so that we could more fully dine on our new tasty treat.

Yes, you are all equal in our eyes, e Plurubus unim and all that, but some are more equal than others. Enjoy.