Sam Robeson - February 20, 2018
Congratulations are in order for Kourtney Kardashian. The Jenndashian brothel mate is apparently one of the stars of Keeping Up With the Prostitutes, but at only five feet tall, she often doesn't clear the hight needed to be picked up by the cameras. At least this is the best explanation I can think of as to why we never hear from her. Aside from the fact that she's ugly. But, that's all of them. Mysteries abound.
Anyway Kourtney has finally made it onto headlines after revealing her weight on the latest episode of KUWTP. She walks into the kitchen where Beast is eating a salad (producers made her swap it out for the gazelle she was feasting on) before declaring that she ran at some point. Beast follows up this stupid and useless fact by asking their friend Simon Gebrelul:
You know she’s 97 lbs.?
While secretly thinking "almost big enough to eat." Kourtney, stunned that someone's acknowledging her, responds:
Guess what? I gained a pound. I’m 98 [lbs].
Headlines are saying that Kourtney is an official skinny legend, but if you look at the suggested BMI chart on Health.gov, Kourtney's weight to height ration is under "healthy." While her sisters' weights are under "physical comedy." I'm giving this one to Kourtney to show that WWTDD is accepting of all people, even midget troll monsters, but this will be the last time we check in on her ever if I have anything to say about it. She's probably in Beast's lower intestine at this point anyway.
Photo Credit: Instagram