Singer and tiny bikini enthusiast Amber Rose rode around on a jet ski in what can only be described as a couple of handkerchiefs worth of fabric. Amber is a kind and giving soul which is why she likes to show us all her amazing funbags and luscious booty. Her boobage is spectacular. They are the kind of ta-tas that could give a man carpal tunnel syndrome from handling them but it would totally be worth it. But it is perhaps Amber’s massive, beautiful booty that is most exciting. I know that it certainly gets my attention. I like a woman with some meat in her seat, if you get my meaning. My grandfather always told me that you can’t trust a woman with a flat ass. Those are words that I live by.
I do imagine she got quite the wedgie from riding a jet ski in that thong. But once again, that’s her suffering for our viewing pleasure. What a gal.
Photo Credit: INF
Amber Rose certainly seemed in the attention getting mode this weekend in Miami. Maybe it’s to deflect the conversation away from her custody battle and onto things she clearly fully owns, like her big yams and thumper. I’d do the same if I had such sweet meaty diversionary tactics at my disposal.
Amber strutted about the Miami Beach resort areas in a revealing pink bikini top, followed not long after by a see-through yellow thong number that left little to the imagination, or a ton depending on how you look at it:
I’ll say this for Amber Rose, despite the rather complicated personal life, if she keeps hanging around the beach hanging out thusly, she probably won’t be waiting long before her next rapper romance. There is something to be said for spankability factor. Amber Rose has got that going on in multi-colors. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash/FameFlynet
You know, considering how much malted beverage I consumed during the course of two football games this Sunday, I’m impressing myself with my ability to type with only my typical number of spelling and grammatical mistakes. As in many, but no more than usual. I just had to share these self-shared photos by Amber Rose on Facebook this evening featuring the shaved head model and former Kanye and Wiz Khalifa lady in just about the most undersized bit of bikini we’ve seen her in before, showing off on her Miami balcony. It’s quite a memorably visual moment. It’s just not a set of shapes you see all that often. It’s, well, it’s mesmerizing.
I’m not exactly sure how Amber even achieved the feat of climbing into this suit. I’ll assume levels and measuring tapes and protractors were involved. It’s rather ingenious really. Not to mention about as curvy as humanly possible without actually going full Humpty Dumpty. I’m impressed. And just a wee bit slack-jawed. Enjoy.
In the annals of boob history there have perhaps been no funbags of the magnitude of Pamela Anderson. She and Amber Rose were turning heads at a Rolling Stones exhibit opening. Pam Anderson’s boobs have only gotten better like wine. They are the Platonic form of the perfect breast. I mean, just look at them. I remember going to the theater in the mid-90’s to see Barbed Wire starring Pam. Was it a good movie? No. Did I enjoy seeing her boobage 20 feet tall. But it wasn’t all the Pamela boob show. Amber Rose was sporting a see-through skirt. Holy mother of sweet cheeks she’s got a fine behind. She had on a nice thong on and she was showing more whale tail than a whaling expedition.
I wish that I had been there. Why don’t I ever get invited to these kinds of parties? I’m cool….aren’t I?
Photo Credit: Splash News
The hot ladies of color were anything but demure over the weekend at the BET Awards were big ole sweet boobtastic rules the day on the red carpet. As it should be. If you weren’t adjusted your sweet jugs walking up to the event, you weren’t even in the game. Sextastic rackalicious likes of Tatyana Ali, Adrienne Bailon, Naturi Naughton, Ashanti, Pia Mia Perez, Amber Rose (and for some reason, Paris Hilton) all walked the chesty show off walk for the Awards show.
I don’t watch a lot of BET programming, though that number would rise dramatically if there was a show called March of the Big Chested Lovely Ladies. I’d DVR that with override to Must Record. Because women of all colors float my boat. The S.S. Egotastic!, with stops in all ports of call where we aren’t currently wanted dead or alive for crimes of passion. Hey, a sailor gets lonely. Enjoy.
Hey, remember when Amber Rose claimed that a very intrusive and aggressive Kim Kardashian was secretly texting nasty messages to Amber’s then boyfriend Kanye West and ruining their relationship and we all kind of laughed and shrugged it off as Amber being kind of a crazy woman? Well, yeah, that happened.
Ever since being another victim of the Kardashian merchandising and female trafficking mafia, I’ve kind of felt a kinship with Amber Rose. And ever since we saw Amber topless, I’ve felt and even stronger kinship. Needless to say, she’s fun to ogle. Including her cleavage show on the set of School Dance, a film that seems antithetical to most every man-rule about movies, but also contains a bunch of hotties so it will be a tough call. Enjoy.