bill-swift - January 8, 2013
Brazilian officials have caught the mastermind of a prison break: a cat. This feline Steve McQueen in The Great Escape was captured by prison guards as it tried to sneak into a prison in Arapiraca, Brazil. The cat was delivering escape tools to prisoners on the inside. How does a cat carry tools? By taping them to its body, of course! The cat had a cell phone, batteries, drills, and saws taped to its back and abdomen. The theory is that a couple of prisoners trained the beast to walk in and out of the prison to bring in contraband. Besides the question about the state of Brazilian prison security in which pets come and go at will, you have to wonder who taped the tools to the cat? A girlfriend of the prisoners? Maybe. But what if the real villain is the cat? It's a fact that cats are dastardly creatures that spend their lives scheming. I know that my cat is plotting my death, (probably because I made her wear a tin foil hat for a bunch of Egotastic! videos). Friends, you dismiss the criminal motives of cats at your own risk.