Elle Macpherson Bikini Pictures Fifty and Faptastic

While my forty and faptastic list is rather lengthy, the fifty plus version dwindles rather extensively. Though there are clear and obvious rule breakers. Like Elle Macpherson. On a day when we are celebrating bikini beauties at the beach, how about a sweet homage to the queen bee of hot bikini pictures for three decades now. The Aussie with the hot long lean body who can steal teach the youngin's a thing or two about strutting in a two piece.

Elle was on vacation on a yacht off the coast of Italy when she decided to don one of her little bikinis and show off front side and backside half-century hotness. She more than caught my eye. She made 10,000 images of her ridiculously alluring surfer girl hotness flash before my eyes. Then I passed out. Then I woke up wondering what time it was and if Elle would respond to my request for an Adult Nursing Relationship post I made to her on Craigslist Palm Beach. So much to think about, and so much Elle sextastic to focus on. Bless you, Ms. Macpherson. Enjoy.

Lea Michele’s Thong Bikini Booty and Other Fine Things to Ogle

Lovin' The Lingerie
Natasha Barnard can join us in bed if she wears this Read More »
Danity Kane's Boobtastic
Aubrey O'Day and the Danity Kane girls flaunt some skin Read More »
Holly Coleman's Hot Bod
This hottie should be on your radar, you can thank us later Read More »

Lea Michele is bootylicious in this teeny tiny thong bikini (Drunken Stepfather)

Danity Kane is back and more boobtastic than ever (Hollywood Tuna)

The Texans cheerleaders have a new sexy calendar. You're welcome. (Busted Coverage)

Natasha Barnard's lingerie spread is all you need right now (Popoholic)

Sarah Hyland's cleavage is white hot (Starpulse)

Holly Coleman nearly nekkid, teasing us in bed (COED)

Give yourself a workout with these chicks who are ready for a workout (The Chive)

Rosie Jones Topless Hotness Invades Interivu Magazine

 

I guess I wasn't the only one celebrating Rosie Jones epic funbags and her birthday this weekend. The good folks at Interviu magazine in Spain saw fit to honor Rosie with their cover and a sweet spread of her chestal goodness within.

Rosie Jones was born to model and make people happy. Not many people can say they're doing precisely as Mother Nature intended. Rosie brings so much happiness to so many people and at just 24 now, she has so many more years to keep doing so. Her legacy is as firm as... well, never mind. The point is, Rosie Jones is a goddess to whom I would bring purified rain water in a lotus leaf each morning to gently wake her. Well, first the morning sex, then the lotus leaf bit. A man has to keep his priorities. Enjoy.

Paulina Porizkova Bikini Pictures on Grecian MILFtastic Holiday

It's hard to believe Paulina Porizkova will soon be turning 50. It's easy to believe I've lusted for her European bikini sensibilities since before my bobos even dropped. She's been super hot forever.

Paulina and her bikini body took to a Mykonos holiday for the July holiday season. She flashed a frontside and derriere still gifted from the heavens and a good twenty-five years after she retired from SI modeling. It's really incredible to think about. Mostly, it makes me really jealous of that dude from the Cars she's been married to these past twenty-five years. But seeing her bikini tush on the Isles of Greece, I do realize she has a little something in her bag of benevolence for us all. Let' not fight, let's share. Though, obviously, me first. Enjoy.

Aubrey O’Day and Her Boobtastic Aplenty Reunites With Danity Kane for Vegas Pool Party

Are you like me? Did you cry when you heard Danity Kane broke up? Did they break up? I don't know, I just like to cry a lot, I'm very in touch with my sensitive side. Just as I was when I saw Aubrey O'Day and her girl group cohorts flashing their lady parts on the red carpet of some Vegas pool party over the weekend. They were performing I think, I kind of lost track in the fog of staring deep into the magical chest of Aubrey O'Day as it washed away all my troubles like a Calgon bath of funbags.

I can't say I was ever much for the Danity Kane sound, but as far as Aubrey O'Day and her Danity Kane Double-D's, well, that has always been music to my ears. MTV's Making the Boobs, err, Making the Band lives on its musical progeny. Two enormous progenies staring back at me right now in fact. Bless your low cut tops, Aubrey. Enjoy.

The ‘Doom 4′ Reveal Was a Chainsawin,’ Explosionin’ Good Time; So We Hear (VIDEO)

Doom 4 Quakecon Reveal
The most doomtastic Doom you ever saw. Apparently.

You know how the gamertastic can be. Particularly those of us who are long-term fans of a certain franchise. We clutch our beloved Final Fantasy/Resident Evil/Zelda/other to our man-boobs like our firstborn children. Should developers eff around with them, the fire and brimstone and impotent spittle-flying Internet rage is unleashed.

By, y’know, the crazies among us. Not everybody. Anywho, let’s see what happened when hardcore Doomaholics were shown footage of Doom 4 at QuakeCon last week.

Kotaku and the unofficial QuakeCon forums bring us this footage, seven of the most enthusiastic freaking minutes you can fathom. The reveal of the new installment itself is strictly top-secret, and couldn’t be recorded. (On pain of ‘a renegade band of Cacodemons coming to your home at 4am to shit on the doorstep and eat your face,’ id Software’s lawyers said. Except they didn’t.) So this is just lucky attendees’ reactions.

Still, it’s safe to say that fans will not be disappointed. For once. After collating all of their testimonials, it looks like the general opinion was: 1) back to its roots, 2) amazing combat, 3) holy crap and 4) I need new pants.

All of which are good signs. We're on board.

Diane Kruger Bare-Arse Wonderment and Deborah Ann Woll Making the Passionate Sexy Highlight the Boob Tube Roundup (VIDEO)

 

We are living in glorious times. While we do have to pay for 500 channels we don't watch, there are a solid dozen now putting out mature fare for the mature viewers who like mature things. As a for instance, hot women without their clothes on. Everybody seems to be jumping on that bandwagon that started at the dawn of mankind. Or at least since we got our bobos dangling.

This week's Boob Tube Roundup include Diane Kruger bare bottomed in FX's second season of The Bridge, Deborah Ann Woll somehow having frenzied passion in True Blood but not quite flashing her udders, Lucy Walters tight nice booty in Power, Alexandra Gordon floating bare boobtastic in Hemlock Grove from Netflix, and Jaime Murray and her slender hot body make-up alien like for Defiance on SyFy. Let's just file these ladies under the rather extensive list of sextastic celebrities I wouldn't throw out of bed for really any reason. Such wonderful boob tube times. Enjoy.