Jewel Is Looking Hot

 I do not know the legal definition of the word jewel, but it has to apply to this gem of a woman. I have never thought too long on what a jewel needs to be. Where I come from Jewel is the name of a supermarket, so it is hard to think of them as being very prestigious.

It's strange how a word can become tainted like that. I also used to think well of royalty, but then Prince Fielder stepped onto the baseball field and he forced me to never think of the word in the same way again. Even now I am compelled to spit after saying the word. Being that I am in my bedroom right now that is proving to be very problematic, giving me one more thing to hold against him. 

Given how well she is aging she might want to think about a name change to Diamond, because she looks like she is going to last forever. Feel free to use that as a pickup line if you ever come across a Jewel, or the Jewel, in a bar. They have probably heard worse lines in their lives.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Pacific Coast News