Who’s Hotter: Alexis Ren or Allie Ayers?

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aldo-vallon - February 19, 2018

I have not been heard a question this difficult to answer since I was first asked, “What happens when the unstoppable force meets the immovable object?” I have no answer now, just as I had no answer then, only now I cannot use the bathroom as a reason to excuse myself. Regardless, I will try my best to answer. Let’s go down the checklist shall we?

They both definitely have boobs, but it is difficult to say whose are bigger in their current outfits, so I will call it a draw. Alexis has the edge when it comes to legs because it looks like she could squat a refrigerator. Allie, however, has the strong cheekbones of an Indian, so she gets the edge for the face.

It is a close race so far, and the point deductions are right around the corner. Allie loses a point for clearly dyeing her hair. I like my girls to be natural, or at least not obviously fake. And Alexis loses a point for reminding me of a girl I knew in high school. I know that is petty, but I am the judge so I will allow it.

I refuse to let this end in a tie, because I find that word repugnant out of principle. Since Alexis looks like she fell into a box of tinsel and decided to just go with it, I am going to give her the win.

Photo Credit: Splash News

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