Weird Crap Sold On Coupon Sites: The Turbo Toilet

Christmas may be over but that doesn't mean that you can't get that someone special something nice. I mean, Valentine's Day is coming up before you know it. But what do you get the person who has everything? I know something that is both useful and is real conversation piece: the Turbo Toilet. Available for only $39.99 from Groupon, it's essentially a crapper that you can take with you anywhere. It's meant for use while camping but I say why limit yourself to that? I live in New York City and sometimes when I'm wandering around the city it is hard to find a bathroom...not anymore. So, how does it work? Basically, it is a large vinyl tub filled with some kind of weird magic. The description reads:

"This camping toilet designed for the outdoors creates a manageable gel out of waste, making outdoor bathroom breaks easy and sanitary."

I think the idea of it making "manageable gel out of waste" is perhaps the most frightening concept I've ever heard. Then what do you do with this gel? Am I supposed to carry it around with me until I can properly dispose of it or do I just dump it in the East River when no one is looking? It comes in yellow and cammo.