Porn Star Maria Jade’s Asstastic Beachside Yoga Show

Given what her typical work uniform is I bet Maria Jade feels like she is bundled up for winter when wearing that bikini. I used to work in a refrigerated factory back in the day which required me to put on layers in order to stave off minor discomfort, and when I moved on I remember feeling nude when I was able to wear a single shirt while being able to maintain my comfort. I assume there is a similar effect for porn stars, only in reverse.

Then again, women always seem to have a resting body temperature that is only slightly above that of hypothermia, so who knows. It does not seem to matter what a woman’s BMI is, even the slightest draft within a room might as well be farts from Jack Frost by the way they respond to them. I would not mind so much if the act of cuddling did not annoy me so.

The way I see it, we should either be engaging physically, or not touching at all. I do not care about conserving body heat when I am watching a movie on my couch, and it is too difficult for me to decipher the signs of what leads to sex and what is an act of survival. I must have skipped that day of school.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA