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Nicola Peltz Is On the Set of Transformers and Barely Legally Hot

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bill-swift - August 7, 2013

Not much is known about Nicola Peltz, the new young femme fatale set to feature in Transformers 4, whenever that blessed cinematic event arrives. But I can tell you this, open the doors to Hebrew School Hotties land, because Nicola, now eighteen, is a true Egotastic! lady in the making.

Nicola's dad used to own Snapple, so she comes from money. A lifetime supply of Diet Peach Snapple and 24-7 access to this young sextastic thespianic, means I'll soon be visiting her family compound to ask her parents permission to defile their daughter in ways that can not possibly be described using just the English language. I'll bring my sketchbook.

Yes, I know, it's obvious when I'm starting to fall for a girl. I wish I could be more subtle, but, well, just look at Nicola. Michael Bay doesn't make these cheesecake decisions lightly (just ask Megan Fox and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley). This is a big gig. Enjoy.


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