I Promise These Aren’t Three Videos Of The Leave Britney Alone Guy Eating Food Out Of His Ass

Trust is such an important part of life, and in 2019 we should all learn to trust more. Not everyone is out to get you. Certainly not me. Which brings us to these three videos not of Chris Crocker - AKA the "leave Britney alone" guy - eating spaghetti, a hot dog, and pizza off his ass. One food for each video. Except not. Because none of these feature Chris Crocker eating spaghetti, a hot dog, or pizza off his naked ass. That's not how he decided to ring in the new year on Twitter. And it's not how you're going to ring in the new year either. Because someone definitely didn't ruin my day by springing these on me, and I'm definitely not going to ruin your day by doing the same.

In conclusion, these three links below will not by any stretch of the imagination take you to videos of the leave Britney alone guy eating spaghetti, a hot dog, and pizza off of, or frankly, out of, his ass. Please remember. This year is going to be about trust.

Head HERE to not see Chris Crocker eat spaghetti off his ass

Head HERE to not see Chris Crocker eat a hot dog out of his ass

Head HERE to not see Chris Crocker eat pizza off his ass

Photo Credit: YouTube, Instagram