The Problem With A Testicular Beauty Contest

There are a lot of beauty contests out there and most of them are basically the same. Girls in bikinis and evening gowns talking about world peace. But one perv, named Brian Sloan, created The World's Most Beautiful Vagina Contest. I can get behind that. Many, many ladies entered their naughty bits for the chance of being named the world's most beautiful lady parts. He then used the vag as a model to create a sex toy of superb aesthetic beauty. But now he has an idea for a new contest that strikes me as strange. He wants to have a World's Most Beautiful Balls Contest. The end result is the same, bragging rights plus having your balls immortalized as a sex toy. Because what ladies want is a pair of rubber balls. He said of his reasoning for focusing on the balls and not the shaft,

"The penis receives most of the attention when it comes to male genitalia and I thought a contest about the penis would be too predictable. The scrotum, in many cases, comprises the bulk of the volume of the male genitals yet it is rarely discussed. Beauty standards for it are unknown."

You know why beauty standards for it are unknown? Because they are effing hideous. No woman, (or dude who likes dudes), is turned on by the scrotum. They have to ignore the balls just to be able to do it because it makes them sick. I really don't get this at all. I guess some people out there must like them. People are weird.