Okay, so nobody’s perfect. I mean that literally. We only chase perfection. Or in my case, my eyes chase perfection in the form of some of the hottest bodied women in the entire world passing before my eyes daily, hourly, by the second. But I always stop to smell the roses. And take the time to leer up and down at the likes of Chanelle Hayes and her body faptastic stripteasing in Zoo magazine.
Chanelle gives me hope, inspiration, and a series of neural responses that can only be described as indiscreet. Oh, to bathe in that boobtastic sea of hers. Bath time would be ever so fun with her rubber duckies in play. Chanelle, I’ll draw the water, you bring the loofahs, we’ll meet in the middle. You will never know a more precise cleaning. Trust me. Enjoy.
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Sophie Reade certainly seems like a fun girl. I can’t claim to know her as well as some of her peers, but she and her bodacious racktastic certainly strike me as somebody who’d make my top ten list of ladies I’d love to have in my hot tub. If I had a hot tub. Or ladies.
Featured in Zoo magazine, Sophie shows why she’s perfectly suited to the simple sextastic photoshoots owned by girls with winning smiles and even more winning bodies. On Fridays, we like to round out our week of fine female forms, with the memorable curves of some of the finest, funnest, and most raptastic ladies on the planet. If you’re not dreaming of Sophie Reade tonight, you’re not dreaming properly. Thank God It’s Funbags!
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I feel like I haven’t seen Holly Peers perfect chesty delights in forever. Even an hour away from her nurturing mammaries is too long for any man, let alone a baby, to endure.
Featured in this month’s Zoo magazine, Holly shows why she doesn’t need much styling or set decoration, let alone wardrobe, to be the belle of the visual ball. She’s the kind of neighbor lady you hope doesn’t install shades because she assumes nobody would be crazy enough to build a fifty-foot ladder of thatch and gum just to peek into her boudoir. Those are the kind of neighbor ladies that have yet to live next door to me. I’d build an escalator to the moon for the chance to see Holly lotioning her perfect jugs each evening. Then I’d never get off of it. Damn, Holly, you get me every time. Enjoy.
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To know Alice Goodwin is to know love. Well, to know the love of some faptastic funbags on a raven haired Brit beauty. I’m not really sure how you even describe love beyond that. It’s my definition at least.
Appearing quite simply, frontally, and boobtastically bare in Zoo magazine, Alice and her hefty chest puppies prove that you don’t need lots of staging and styling, let alone wardrobe, to make a lasting artistic impression on your eyeballing audience. No need for profound metaphors here, just outstanding yams. I feel like a kid in a toy store except that’s not model airplanes capturing my attention. Alice, you are ever so passion inducing. Huzzah!
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English model and professional hot person Rosie Jones showed off her Britannic majesties for the June issue of Zoo Magazine. Rosie is very thin but has some huge funbags. We’re talking serious motorboating material here. If I had to rate her ta-tas on a scale of one to ten I’d give her an 11, like Spinal Tap but sexier. It also helps that she is seriously effing pretty. Like, strikingly so. She’s got that flirty look that makes men’s knees knock together. But she still looks approachable. She seems like the type of girl that you could have a couple of pints with at the pub and maybe have a snog in a dark corner. See all those British words I just used. I’ve watched shows on the BBC. I’m cultured.
I do enjoy the ladies of the British isles. I am drawn to their polite hotness.
You may remember Rachel Williams from her rather epic seemingly never ending bouncy funbag display to celebrate the anniversary of Zoo magazine. Now, Rachel and her bodacious racktastic are back in Zoo and crawling about an indoor pool area with her bikini top not long for this world. Oh, those killer yams on Rachel. She really is one of the wonders of this world.
At the midpoint of the week we try to bring you a pair of funions so spectacular that you can ride them like a wave into the latter half of your work week. Rachel Williams blessed pair don’t just produce waves, they produce a tsunami of special happy feelings right where Mother Nature designated you a man. Or Sapphic leaning woman. One of those two. Or something else. The point is, your cockles are warm. Enjoy.
Warning: this goes on for 69 minutes and is very hard to turn off:
Oh, sure, the true romantic feelings between busty hotties Joey Fisher and Leah Francis may be faked, but since when do we care about faked emotions? We’re men. We do that in our sleep. What is important is the crazy hot visuals of Joey and Leah in their black lingerie rolling around atop and astride one another until those tops come off. Now that’s what I call romance.
There is no greater love than that expressed between two beautiful young women while gentlemen oglers stare on in a happy stupor as in this wonderful Zoo magazine pictorial. I’m sure the classic poets used to write all about it. I didn’t read much in school. Joey, Leah, if you ever need a place to hang and ply your sextastic friendship fun time activities, just let me know. Mi casa is most definitely su casa. Bring a change of undies. Enjoy.
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