Zoo magazine

Holly Peers Topless Thong Clad Curves of Glory for Zoo

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Holly Peers, how I have missed you. I imagine the feeling is mutual. Though that might just be imagining. Most importantly, the peerless puppies of this delightful DD Brit are back and curvy perfect in Zoo magazine, one of the last remaining lads magazines in all of the Empire.

Holly was one of the very first busty topless glamour girls we ever fell in lust with. She’s simply outrageously hot, which helps, and her melons of pure joy are more than the hair of the dog that bit your bobos, she’s downright anatomically inspiring. There’s nothing you can’t do if you keep your eye on the prize, err, prizes. Personally, I might hit the gym. Mostly watch a little TV and drink one of those energy drinks. It’s really more of a club. Holly, check your email, I’m sending selfies of my curls. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine


Summer St. Claire Lacy White Lingerie Dreams

Summer St. Claire makes me want to be a much better man. Nothing that would take too much time or effort, but maybe shave more often or rescue a cat from a tree instead of watching it from the ground and yelling ‘Jump! Jump!’. She’s just so damn alluring whether in her original blonde or her often new found brunette.

Zoo magazine had the bright idea to put Summer in some clothes, albeit lacy white lingerie, and get her posing and preening for maximum lust inducement. I’d say it’s working, at least on this end. Wow. I’m not sure what I’d do were I to come home after a long day of three hours of work and find Summer like this crawling across my own faux Berber carpet, but I’d probably start with a faint just for good measure. Followed by mumbling, drooling, and catatonic staring, all to let the lady know, oh, yes, I’m ready and available. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine

Melissa Debling Super Sextastic Top Heavy In White Lingerie For Zoo Magazine

Melissa Debling just makes me smile. Oh, sure you could say it’s related to her ridiculously hot body and those funbags that were made in the factory called Awesome, and, you’d be right. But what about that killer smile, that come hither look, and just how perfect she looks in white lingerie on the pages of Zoo Magazine Australia. And as if I would leave out that perfectly squeezable hiney.

We’re used to seeing Melissa quite topless, which is a forever treat, though I must say it’s nice to feel the overwhelming happy feelings of this alluring blonde babe in bra and panties. They do have to come off at some point. And we’ll be there to report. This is our journalistic credo. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine Australia

Stacey Poole And Joey Fisher Topless Babes in a Bed

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Nature has yet to invent a beauty equal to the not so mysterious wonder of two hot topless girls playing with each other. Really, I’ve seen the waterfalls and canyons and mountain peaks and rainbows, this is really tops. Bless you Stacey Poole and your BFF Joey Fisher for reminding me of the pure passion inducing power of even slightly faked lesbionics. There’s nothing fake about my feelings, I assure you.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to express myself emotionally and I’m not super comfortable doing that in front of others. It takes a real man to admit his girlish feelings. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine

India Reynolds Topless Turkey Roasting, It’s the Next Big Thing, Err, Things, Err Just Look

India Reynolds Cooks A Turkey Topless
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I’m not sure at what internal temperature you know India Reynolds is ready to eat, but I’m going to take a guess at 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit. I’ll have that in Kelvin degrees just as soon as I build a time machine and go back and pay attention in school. The brunette hottie glamour model decided it would be festive if she prepped and roasted the holiday turkey without her top on. I can tell you most chefs if not kitchen safety experts would not recommend having your sweet jugulars dangling so close to ovens and open flames. But sacrifices must be made in the form of culinary art. I speak from experience as man who once made chicken wings in the buff and shall never forget the singe of 375 degrees grease splatter on the nuggets. Never again.

Zoo magazine thought differently and convinced the lovely luscious India to be a more revealing Julia Childs. For those who are simply not interested in kitchen crafts, behold, the joy of cooking. Oh, man, that bird looks delicious. The one holding the turkey. Get it, because… nevermind. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Today Advent Calendar/Instagram

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Rosie Jones Topless for the Happiest of Holidays

Rosie Jones Goes Holiday Topless For Zoo Magazine
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As my consistently drunk Uncle Eddie used to sing each December, it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas… in my pants. It was kind of funny even though he laughed so hard he’d pass out then my parents would let him sleep it off in my bed while I got the couch. There’s really no substitute for family.

Or for wicked hot British brunette object d’ lust like Rosie Jones who knows precisely how to treat the holidays. With reckless topless abandon and some naughty Santa’s helper type costumery. Rosie Jones doesn’t need much production value to make her the belle of the Yuletide topless ball, with her absolutely lust inducing perfect female form on full display. Oh, Rosie, you bring back so many fond memories of Christmases past imagining you in nothing but a single chimney hung stocking. We could embrace in coital passion right beneath the Douglas Fir, flocking with abandon. Now, I’ve gone and corrupted Christmas once more. I blame you, Rosie, and those stellar funbags. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine

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Alice Goodwin Is Your Hot Brunette Fantasy Girl, Go On, Admit Your Naughitness!


Sometimes I’m shouting at you, but I’m really shouting at myself. That’s why my shrink the esteemed Dr. Wilcox-Spangler told me recently in session. So, perhaps Alice Goodwin is my hot brunette fantasy girl and I’m the naughty one. It certainly seems within the realm of possibility. I do happen to love beautiful women with raven hair and jugs that could contain me like the happiest prisoner on earth.

Feature in the Zoo Magazine hottest brunettes list, Alice Goodwin continues a relatively long and hallowed career of making men feel like a man and women feel just a little bit more like a horny Ellen Page than they might otherwise. Oh, Alice, why would Mother Nature even invent such a bodacious bosomed passion inducing hottie named Alice except to tease the heck out of the rest of us? I have no answers, just eyeballs blowing out like Bluto. Alice Goodwin, you move my soul. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Zoo Magazine

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