There was a time when we regularly peeked at sextastic thespianic Ashley Greene. Historians refer to this period formally as the Age of Great Erections. Then she kind of went away for a while. Who knows. Romance, private times, reclusive desires, break from work. I do not know. But every now and then the talented Ms. Greene returns to us in some heavenly form to remind us of those golden ages. Such as this short but sweet pictorial in Women’s Health magazine. I’m not expert in women’s health, but Ashley Greene sure looks glowing and healthy to me. Also hot, which I think is the better part of good health.
Ashley, I can’t stand the thought of you going away ever again. Could you maybe find it in your heart to appear before the cameras more often in even less? I’m asking on behalf of a grateful world. Either way, no hard feelings. Well, okay, harder if you say yes. You are so damn hot. Enjoy.
There they go again, those silly magazines promising nekkidness and only delivering half way. Thankfully, it’s Zoe Saldana without any clothes on and barely covered up, which means it’s a whole lot of temptation and allure nonetheless.
Featured in the latest edition of Women’s Health magazine, the very healthy and now very pregnant Zoe Saldana shows off pretty much every inch of her body, save for our favorite inches, including a tight little booty that just seems ever so caressable. I’m not sure that’s actually a real word, but it ought to be. Zoe most definitely looks healthy to me. Obviously, I’d need my goggles and rubber tipped pliers to do a more thorough examination. Offshore naturally, where the laws regarding such inspections are more lax. Zoe, you are super hot. Becoming a mommy only makes you ten points higher in my book. And, yes, I do have a book. Enjoy.
Modern Family star Sofia Vergara looks as amazing as she always in the May issue of Women’s Health Magazine. The Colombian superstar is wearing teeny tiny shorts and a t-shirt that she seems desperate to take off. In the cover photo, she has tied the shirt up to show some of her muscled stomach. And, of course, her famous ladies look like they are going to leap off the page and give you the motorboating of your lifetime. I’ve been in love with Sofia since I was a young lad and she appeared on my mom’s telenovelas. The amazing thing about Sofia is that she is as hot now as she was when she was in her twenties. That’s a rare feat. I forget sometimes that she’s in her forties.
As far as I’m concerned, Sofia may be the perfect woman. Like, the Platonic form of womanhood I learned about in my useless college philosophy classes.
If you’re not a subscriber to Women’s Health magazine, well, it’s probably because you’re not a woman, or very healthy, or, perhaps because you never imagined how many hot women a woman’s health magazine could contain. But, I do. It’s my job. I’m a detective.
And therein contains the deliciously hot Jessica Alba, who has shied away from most male attention since restocking her prodigious brood, but who can not hide from being one of the most desirable moms in the world, from a meaningful personality and intercourse perspective.
Lay down your plastic matting if you will and take a peek behind the quite innocent, but must-see scenes, of Jessica’s magazine photoshoot…
Check Out the Jessica Alba BTS Video »
Anything Alba, always hot.
At times, Jessica Alba appears to be stepping out of her mommy and mommy-business woman role and back into the sextastic modeling. But it’s fleeting glimpses of her still shining bright amazing looks, then back into her business wear to operate her booming Internet kid friendly products business and stroller time with the offspring.
So, we were more than pleased to see the MILFtastic Jessica Alba featured in this month’s Women’s Health magazine, showing off a little something something. And while it’s not quite Jessica in yoga pants bending over a bouncy-ball (which I am currently imagining), anything Alba, always hot.
We will take Candace Bailey hot pictures any way we can, including in the December edition of Men’s Fitness magazine.
On a plane on a train on a boat or with a goat. Candace Bailey revs our fanboy motors and the chance to see her looking fit and healthy just makes us want to get off the couch, stretch, run to the fridge for a beer, sit back down on the couch, and ogle Candace Bailey for a few more couch potato hours. It’s a vicious circle we desperately embrace. Enjoy.
What with Snow White and The Huntsman coming out tomorrow in theaters, and we are geeked to see that mofo, everybody will once more be rejoicing in the evil hotness that is Charlize Theron in what is sure to be yet another memorable performance. And we will be the dudes who are telling all the new Charlize fans that we’ve lusted Charlize Theron for forever now, and, sure, nobody will care about our old school bragging, but we will feel proud that we’ve been seeing C.T. in our dreams since we were old enough to learn how to lock the bathroom door.
And, in honor of Charlize’s latest and greatest sextastic performance, we put together a little hotness tribute gallery of some of our favorite photos of the South African sweetness since the last millenium. Enjoy.