Vogue Magazine

Candice Swanepoel Topless Cowgirl for Mario Testino Shoot in Vogue

Candice Swanepoel Topless Cowgirl for Vogue Germany with Edita Vilkeviciute
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Well, damn if Mario Testino didn’t get to shoot Miley Cyrus topless first for Vogue Germany, then follow up immediately thereafter with our Lady of Candice Swanepoel topless as a cowgirl for the same publication. Talk about your walking talking and gawking fantasy visions. The uber-sextastic Candice Swanepoel with her precious pair bare and nipple-ready beneath a cowboy hat.

And who happens to be joining her in a couple of these photos? Only my future wife Edita Vilkeviciute. This one dropped straight down from heaven without passing Go. Though I am more than willing to pay $200 if Candice removes everything but the cowboy hat. Damn! Enjoy.

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Miley Cyrus Topless Teats Flaunted Once More in Vogue Germany

Miley Cyrus Topless in Vogue Germany March 2014
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Another day, another bit of Miley Cyrus finally showing off her chest bare and square. No music video hidden tricks here, just a whole lot of clear views of Miley’s perky pair on the pages of Vogue Germany. We’ll look to get you better photos, but for now, take in the world’s most popular music star flaunting her forlorn sexuality on the pages of this European fashion magazine.

Say what you will about Miley Cyrus, she’s no tease, like some other pop music artists we know. She puts her mammies where her mouth is. When she says she’s not shy, she’s shows she’s not shy. Good for you, Miley. Good for us. Good for the planet. I’m still not buying any of your craptastic double-entendre auto-tuned songs, but I will defend you and your boobtastic on this very day. Enjoy.

(P.S. Thanks to a million and one of our favorite readers for the head’s up on Miley’s tops-off.)

Edita Vilkeviciute Isn’t Really Working Out, But She’s Definitely Working Out

Sometimes, I just have to share alluring images of my future wife, Edita Vilkeviciutie, the Lithuanian sweetheart who will soon be filling my home with the many babies that arrive as a by-product of our mutual affection and moderate to heavy drinking.

Edita can pull off the passion inducement whether she be baring most all in an important style spread, or just here in Vogue Paris pretending to workout with dumbbells. She has that certain ‘It’ quality that will ultimately probably make me a little concerned when she says she’s going to the store for 30 minutes and comes back the next morning smelling of some exotic cologne. Such will be the complications of our brief, but tempestuous nuptials. I’m prepared for the heartache and regret, if we can just have that honeymoon. I hope she brings the weights along. Enjoy.

Emily DiDonato Covered Topless and Back in Our Ogling Clutches

I can’t help but feel that I’m a bit cursed in that not long after I discover some new incredibly sextastic woman, they seem to disappear into the ether for some period of time. It’s almost as if my frightening, borderline psychotic stalking of their every waking (and sleeping) moment causes them to reflect upon their push into the public eye. But I’m sure I’m just reading into things.

Emily DiDonato shattered our hearts and discombobulated our freaking minds (as in, groins) when we first started seeing bits and glorious pieces of her early last year. Then she kind of went off the grid on us. It was like having the first six digits to a phone number and not the last, what are you going to do? Okay, sure, you could just try 0 to 9 for the final digit, but that could take up to ten phone calls to get it right. That’s real work. Thankfully, Emily is back and sultry wet and covered topless hot in this mini-pictorial for Vogue Spain. I really do want ever so much more of this. I need that final number. Make it ring, Emily, make it ring! Enjoy.

Candice Swanepoel Swanking Sextastic Nipple Slip for Vogue

I happen to like Candice Swanepoel. You may not think she’s super fine, but I sure do. I see past the perfect body, the long blonde hair, the killer looks to the women on the inside. Well, at least inside her top where her perfect perky pair lay almost exposed and her heavenly nipple appearing in this new pictorial for Vogue magazine.

I can’t help but feel that Candice Swanepoel and I have had a love affair for the past several years. She may not know it, or feel it, or be aware of it outside of the legal protection she seeks from me entering the same nation as her at any given time. Still, it feels very real to me. I’m happy with my choice. Not all stalkers can say that about the women they futilely chase year after year. Enjoy.

Candice Swanepoel Is Everywhere Not Wearing Much Clothes

Candice Swanepoel is a busy girl these days. She must be shooting nearly 24×7 these days. This is a good thing. As any sports junkie can tell you, there aren’t too many Bowl games there are too few. Bring on more Beef O’ Brady’s. And bring on even more Candice Swanepoel.

The uber-sextastic South African model’s latest appearance is covered nekkid in an alluring mini pictorial in Vogue Brazil. I’m not sure what it means or what she’s selling, I just know daddy wants. Oh, yes, daddy wants very badly. In 2014, I do promise to stop calling myself ‘daddy’. Though I shall never give up lusting Candice. Enjoy.

Scarlett Johansson Wicked Hot With Too Much Wardrobe in Vogue Mexico

Scarlett Johansson is going out strong in 2013. Already riding her Sexiest Woman Alive title from Esquire, Scarlett is also making her mark in Vogue Mexico this final month of the year, looking all kinds of crazy hot, even if adorned in far too much wardrobe. I’m not exactly sure who decides to pay Scarlett big bucks for a photoshoot then shows up with a whole bunch of covering clothing and accessory items. I suppose it’s those people we call ‘women’.

No man could ever conceive of covering up Scarlett to make her look better. If the magazine were Vogue by Bill, I can assure you it would feature Scarlett nekkid in the reverse crab position trying to maneuver an obstacle course of fluffy pillows and water cannons. Maybe a honey drizzle machine as well. But, no such magazine exists. Not yet. Enjoy.