Topless Posts:

Lea Seydoux Topless Once More in French Magazine

By Bill Swift | June 11, 2013 @ 10:20 am

Fresh off the big victory of her lesbionic love film in Cannes, actress Lea Seydoux is giving up another visual taste of her faptastic fineries in this month's Marie Claire France magazine.

Lea is not the least bit shy about showing off her nekkid form onscreen or in magazines, and we're guessing she's not much for clothes in and around the house. Where in our minds, she's rehearsing for the notoriously real sex scene from her recent film.

Even the mere thought of Lea on a bear skin rug bare with another Euro-hottie exploring their thespianic limits, well, that's more than enough to get me to purchase yet another French fashion magazine. Enjoy.

Matilde Bonasera Topless for Sudamericana Scandal Sextastica

By Bill Swift | June 11, 2013 @ 8:22 am

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Matilde Bonasera Topless in Maxim Argentina

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The only thing better than my favorite telenovelas may be the real life celebrity scandals in the Sudamericana heartlands we cover. Not that we don't have similar type celebrity bedroom scandals in these parts, they just somehow seem more fun when translated from a foreign language.

Enter Matilde Bonasera. Notoriously naughty Argentinean model and TV personality, who depending on who you believe, and how reasonably mediocre my Spanish language skills, may be shacking up with a famous Chilean musician's underage son. They've been spotted on camera making PDAs in public. And while we generally applaud the young men who can score such voluptuous nymphs as Matilde Bonasera, I guess the cradle robbing still has some serious gossip tail down Sudamericana way. Scandalous! Or not. Either way, you now get to see Matilde Bonasera topless in Maxim Argentina, something to consider while searching your feelings. Enjoy.

See Matilde Sexy on Argentinean TV »

Lucy Collett Topless, Barely Legal Candids? Do We Dare to Dream on Mammarial Monday?

By Bill Swift | June 10, 2013 @ 1:55 pm

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Either thanks or curses-straight-to-hell for EgoReader 'Damon' who sent us these images of what is purportedly a younger amateur Lucy Collett having fun in the tub. This is pre-ginger crush, pre-glamour modeling (hopefully not pre-graduating high school). But Lucy in the early ever so promising years. It sure looks like her, though always hard to say for sure when the modeling ladies go through so many dramatic transformations from day one to the present.

On Mammarial Mondays, we dare to dream big. And nothing perhaps bigger than the ever so fine funbags of our belusted Lucy Collett, perhaps here and coquettishly wet in her passion inducing early stages. Enjoy.

Sibel Kekilli Lives in ‘Game of Thrones’, Let’s See Her Nekkid and Very Naughty

By Bill Swift | June 10, 2013 @ 12:07 pm

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Sibel Kekilli from Game of Thrones in Her Former Porn Star Role

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In a slight twist on our favorite 'let's see her nekkid' game. Today, we're celebrating Sibel Kekilli, the hottie brunette consort to Peter Dinklage in Game of Thrones. Now that we know she survives Season Three of the show (oh, yeah, Spoiler Alert), let's hearken back to the time Sibell was but a young struggling sextastic Turkish-German actress in and out of a schoolgirl uniform for a naughty man in some adult entertainment fare.

Now, we all have a little porn in our background. The better looking among us actually got paid to be on the acting end of it, rather than just the massive consumption side where I reside. We see no shame in her previous work. Only a lost schoolgirl run into a big bad wolf. (And, yeah, you can search for your own adult links if you so choose). Enjoy.

Topless Book Reading Deserves Literary Notice

By Bill Swift | June 10, 2013 @ 11:12 am

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A few months back a delightful lady named A.A. asked me to pimp her topless women's recreational group in New York City. Just a bunch of gals who love reading in the cafes and parks quite topless. I balked because we don't really cover such amateur styling events. But, now, it's June and I'm feeling very summery and was thinking about warm weather in The Big Apple and came across these photos from over the weekend and...

...here's the thing. If you want to send me information and photos about your hot topless girl activities group, I'm making no promises it'll ever see the light of day. But it also can't hurt. I can be bought. Cheaply. Enjoy.

P.S. Topless bicyclist protestors also invaded London over the weekend. In case you want to see politically active girls on bikes.

Edita Vilkeviciute Flashing Topless Wonderment for Vogue

By Bill Swift | June 10, 2013 @ 9:43 am

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Edita Vilkeviciute Topless in Vogue France July 2013

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If there's two things people mock me for the most, it's my extensive women's magazine subscriptions and my belief that someday the world class blonde beauty Edita Vilkeviciute will agree to be my first of three short-term wives. But I have a little secret weapon in my arsenal. It's called hope. That doesn't cover the magazine subscriptions. Those I have to pay for with my Diner's Club card. But the knowledge that someday Edita will be Mrs. Egotastic! for about 17 months before our inevitably ugly divorce, that I just see in my mind's eye. The power of positive fantasizing.

My two main sources of mockery combined today as Edita appears in yet another passion-inducing photo set for Vogue France, flashing a little topless goodness and just some all-over hotness, reminding me again why I'd break my vows of bachelorhood for our one-week honeymoon exploring the steak houses of Omaha, not to mention each other. Edita, call me, now, seriously, I want a summer wedding. Enjoy.

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Thank God It’s Funbags! Geena Mullins Topless Lingerie Outtakes Form the Perfect Head of Weekend Steam

By Bill Swift | June 7, 2013 @ 12:37 pm

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Geena Mullins Sultry Topless Nuts Outtakes May 2013

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Wow, what a week. I almost swore, but I'm too much of a pretend gentleman. But, it's been a doozy. You too? Yeah, I thought so. But, in the not too distant future, like a few hours, the weekend looms. The weekend heals the soul and, if you do it right, fills the body with lots of toxins and potentially some non-living microscopic particles. That latter part is what also heals the soul. But if you choose a safe route, you may always bow down to the visual wonderments of a sweetheart sextastic like London glamour model Geena Mullins.

Appearing in blessed outtakes from her recent Nuts magazine photoshoot, Geena reminds us that all good things come in twos and most definitely not small packages. Quite the thrill to see Geena disrobing from her black naughty lingerie into something even a little naughtier. The happiest of wardrobe progressions.

On this Friday, focus on all that is positive and life-affirming and filled with milky goodness. Why the hell not? Thank God It's Funbags!