Topless Posts:

Emily Shaw Changed Her Name to Emily Agnes And Now She’s Playmate of the Month!

 

When suddenly my boobtastic object d'lust Emily Shaw disappeared from our sextastic radar, boy, did I get nervous. I thought she had taken her amazing funbags and gone home for good. But, nay, Emily was plotting a much bigger play for her much bigger than average ridiculously hot racktastic. She's now Emily Agnes and representing England super fine as the July 2014 Playmate of the Month. And, man, in those glasses, that body, the whole naughty secretary thing, wow.

Playboy.TV Free For One Week Still Rolling. Do Not Miss Out!

Shakespeare wrote 'what's in a name?' or something like that. I didn't pay a heck of a lot of attention to high school. But he's got a point. Emily Shaw, Emily Agnes, or Lady Boom Boom, it doesn't matter. I know that ridiculously lust inducing body anywhere. It's simply mind blowing. Enjoy.

Happy Birthday, Rosie Jones! (Our Annual Tribute to the Epic Sextastic That Is Rosie Jones)

 

You know my all-time favorite hotties list runs about 47 single-spaced pages deep. I don't play favorites, I would gladly drown in the sextastic bodies of any one of them. But I have made it a point to specifically remember Rosie Jones each July 19th (okay, we're a day early) and her bountiful gifts she presents each year to millions of passion-filled men and Sapphic leaning women.

It's hard to believe Rosie is only turning 24. This makes it six full years since we've seen her flashing her epic udders for our viewing pleasure. She literally started the day she turned 18, at least officially. For all you do for all of us, all those happy all over tingles, Rosie, happy birthday to you, darling. Enjoy.

Scarlett Johansson Nude Headlines the Mr. Skin Minute (VIDEO)

 

I was going to write some other stuff in the headline, but you know, after Scarlett Johansson nekkid, the conversation sort of stops as there are more important matters to tend to. Like checking out ScarJo in the best cut yet of her topless and bare goodies moments in Under the Skin, finally out on Blu-Ray. You know our friends at Mr. Skin were just dying to get this in the mail.

Joining Scarlett in the Mr. Skin Minute Video this week are Lela Loren and Leslie Lopez getting quite nekkid and boobtastic in Power on Starz and some hot topless scenes from Hemlock, the sexy horror series on Netflix. There really is a lot of something for everyone. Assuming everyone here loves to leer at hot nekkid women. I live off that assumption. Enjoy.

Be sure to get your discounted membership to Mr. Skin now, for full views of the likes of Scarlett and several thousand of her closest nekkid celebrity friends on film.

READER FINDS: Cailin Russo See-Through, Salma Hayek Topless, Hunter Haley King Bikini Bounty, and Much Much More…

 

Hello there blessedly blessed Friday. The day of the week when our thoughts turn in the summer time to great outdoor weekends, wolfing down undercooked yet simultaneously burnt meat off the grill, and admiring the grand power of the sun to toast your flesh from 91 million miles away like you are its pale bitch. But nothing, absolutely nothing on a summer weekend beats seeing hot girls in very little clothing. It's more Americana to me than baseball or apple pie. No comment on my mom. So before I send you off this weekend to do your fair share of ogling, we fill our passion tanks by way of sextastic celebrity skin finds from our very own reader email bag.

This week's Reader Finds includes Nicky Whelan in her see-through wet bikini epic pictorial (thank you to EgoReader 'Stim' for reinvigorating our Whelan feelings), Dutch WAG Yolanthe Sneijder hot in a bikini and nipple slipping (kudos to the benevolent 'Rod'), Cailin Russo quite topless and also quite see-through in a double dip (double the Cailin showoff via 'JJ'), Gene Simmons daughter Sophie Simmons underwater nipple poking (caught on Instagram by speedy 'John'), Anais Zanotti blessedly topless in the Romanian Bunny mag (stellar nekkid body presented by 'Bill P.'), Hannah Martin and Sammi Jo topless tennis activities (hardcourt softballs envisioned by 'Francis'), brunette hottie Alyssa Miller quite topless (much ado about funbags from 'Ken Y.'), Hunter Haley King flashing deep bikini cleave on the soaps (many inches of thanks to 'Jeremy'), Cara Delevingne sextastic boudoir photos (Michelle Rodriguez girlfriend shots via 'Aimee'), Vanessa Paradis topless in yet another Euro-cinematic throwback (hot topless body views delivered by 'Don'), Zoe Trilling topless on the big screen (a ripe contribution from 'Devon E.'), Olivia Wilde so dam hot for Details (the new mommy back in her prime from 'Steven R.'), Indira Varma topless in her star making role (subcontinent ta-ta's via 'Epps'), Sandra McCoy topless in the dearly missed Femme Fatales (I shed a tear thanks to 'Owen'), Salma Hayek topless turn on the beach (I shall always bow down to 'Wright'), Erika Mader and some bodacious funbags in skinematics (a novel visual suggestion from 'Taylor'), and last, but hardly least, another skinematic classic set of ta's from Lori Jo Hendrix (kind wonderments contributed by 'Stan W.'). Now that's a Reader Finds! Enjoy.

Mellisa Clarke So Simple So Topless So Damn Hot

 

It doesn't really take that much for Mellisa Clarke t o make me super happy. I mean like smile all over kind of pleasant feelings. Just taking off her lacy bra works for me in ways I could never have possibly imagined before puberty, though I subconsciously always anticipated.

The alt-brunette slender natural hottie wonder can do so much without the need for theatrics or complex staging or motifs of any kind besides, I'm hot, I'm topless, and you know you want me but I'm not going to say a word. I might be projecting a bit on that last part, but I have a sneaking suspicion that Mellisa Clarke is a heartbreaker of rather noteworthy proportions. I'd be happy to let her break my heart, if it came after an impassioned round of nekkid Yahtzee. Oh, no, a die rolled under you and now it's missing. Search party activate. Enjoy.

Lissy Cunningham Urges Lucy Collett To Bring on the Ta’s for the Battle of the Boobtastic

 

With so much upheaval in the world, I do hope people will once again look at my forward thinking plan to settle all future disputes by contest of hot girls with outrageously plump funbags. I know there's some thrill in full scale bloodletting, but I really do believe sweater puppies properly unleashed can save this world of the need for such primitive forms of conflict resolution. Think of it as pacifism with a twist of crazy fine melons.

This week's non-violent Battle of the Boobtastic pits blonde bodacious battler Lissy Cunningham against my ginger lovely Lucy Collett. I could never possibly play favorites among two girls to whom I'd give my entire world for just one appropriately placed kiss. However, you must play favorites. It's your sacred duty. In your veteran ogling opinion, whose ta-ta's reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: Lissy Cunningham vs. Lucy Collett

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Sara Sampaio Topless Majestic Holy Hotness in Lui Magazine

 

You know I believe Sara Sampaio to be the most sextastic thing out of Portugal in, well, forever really. The sultry dark and alluring model often graces the pages of fashion magazines, swimsuit and occasionally lingerie shoots. But, now, oh lucky days, the ridiculously hot model is topless on the pages of Lui magazine, quickly becoming one of my very favorite periodicals in the world.

It's not that I can't be fully in lust with a young smoking hot model until I've closely examined her sweet funbags. It's just that that does help seal the deal in an orderly and expedited fashion. And, Sara, our deal is more than closed. Your body is just out of this world, though I wish more a part of my world. How I would spoil you if you were my girlfriend. For at least a month or so before neglect and taking for granted and other instinct kicked in. But, oh, what an August we would have. Let'd do this! Clothing optional. Enjoy.