Snooki and J-Woww Partied Up and Cleaved Out for Snooki’s Bachelorette in Miami

Now, I must admit, I thought Snooki was married a few years back, but it turns out she never did get married, just started making babies and perhaps working on her looks a little bit courtesy of the fine doctors in the 90210 business district. Nuptials definitely do require some kind of crazy bachelorette party, especially when being filmed for your reality show, so Snooki got a bunch of her old Jersey Shore girl pals together to hit up Miami and rage. Or just do some silly crap on camera.

Snooki and J-Woww and some of the other girls had their classic cleavage on display for the wild hen party antics. I’m sure when the show comes out you’ll see a little more of the wild stripper party play and cut aways of the girls discussing how crazy the party got. As for me, I’m content with a little ogle and a wish for Snooki the best of luck in the next one to two years of marriage. Enjoy.

Are These Censored Topless Cell Phone Pictures of Snooki and Angelina from Jersey Shore?

I’ve got to admit something to you. I really do not watch Jersey Shore, never been interested outside of J-Woww’s chestal talents. It’s just another clump of MTV craptastic reality programming that is floating around the toilet bowl of lowest common denominator television waitin for a merciful flush.

So I’m zero expert in identifying the star-crossed kuckleheaded starlets of the phony show, including the most famous, Snooki, and former cast-member Angelina Pivarnick, who one Egotastic! reader (Anon) insists is the subject of these raunchy cell phone pictures, from who knows where exactly. We do know there were were bunch of fakes of Snooki released in the not so distant past, and we do know these photos are censored with annoying black bars, which means somebody touched them, but beyond that, well, you be my eyes and ears on this.

Is this Snooki and Angelina Pivarnick? Should we be looking for the photos without the black bars? Or has my 47 hours of straight awake time caused me to wet myself and completely overlook the obvious something or other? Investigate, and enjoy.

Snooki Might Be Pregnant and Might Be Flashing Some of Her Nips Again

Okay, to be fair, I don’t think Jersey Shore finest fattish gnome Snooki was flashing full nipple outside the Sirius XM studios in Manhattan yesterday, and, to be even fairer, with news that somebody of the male gender might have put his you know what in Snooki’s you know where and produced an offspring of some sort, well it’s hard to really focus on tiny measurements of areola slippage when you’re re-tasting your breakfast in your mouth several hours later. The entire thing really is quite a debacle.

But, there are some of you out there, okay, really just one of you out there, and your name is ‘Jack R.’ who for some reason inexplicable, lust all things Snooki related, and, well, we aim to please right down to the last tortured soul. It is our lot in life, like Atlas, only with a much greater weight on our shoulders. Enjoy.