Page 3 Posts:

Page 3 Battle Thursdays: Poppy Rivers vs. Chloe Saxon

By Bill Swift | March 1, 2012 @ 11:52 am

Nice to see the brunettes representing this week on the U.K. Sun's Page 3, with a a battle of some newcomers to Egotastic! for top topless honors of the paper on this Thursday, Poppy Rivers and Chloe Saxon.

So who do you think reigns supreme this week? Personally, I'm going with the magnifying glass and about thirty more minutes of alone time before rending my own decision. Enjoy.

Lacey Banghard and Lucy Collett Battle Top Heavy for Page 3 Weekly Title

By Bill Swift | February 23, 2012 @ 11:41 am

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Consider this like Thunderdome, except that four jugs will enter, but only two will leave. Your two favorite pert pair of boobtastic fantastics courtesy of Page 3 and their never-ending desire to highlight the inherently hot humanity of the best boobs of Britain.

This week we pit Lacey Banghard vs. Lucy Collett, in a battle of chicks with hot names who live up to their nomenclature both above and below the neck, boob to boob, as surely the higher power intended any and all wars to be fought. Whose fully-inflated funbags will win the day? As always, you must make up your own mind, as deliriously foggy as it will be after inspecting the contestants. Enjoy.

Holly Peers and Danni Wells in Thursday’s Topless Page 3 Battle

By Bill Swift | February 9, 2012 @ 12:30 pm

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Anything Holly Peers just has to be super hot. They should make Holly Peers flavored kids medicine. I know I wouldn't have fought my mom if my cough syrup tasted like Holly Peers. Just saying.

Today the ridiculously hot Britty brunette finds herself locked in a battle with hair and body talented Danni Wells for the title of this week's Page 3 chesty champion. Who will take home the golden tata trophy? Well, you must decide that for yourself. And you must only do so after careful examination, but of course. Enjoy your research.

Kelly Hall and Rosie Jones Go Boob-to-Boob in Thursday’s Page 3 Battle

By Bill Swift | February 2, 2012 @ 9:39 am

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Lots of battles going on today, must be something in the water, and by water, I mean the fire water I've slipped into my coffee here this morning for a little hair of the dog that bit me hard last night. But, truly, there's nothing quite finer or more refined spectacle of entertainment than two hot girls going at it in the topless arena.

Our Page 3 boobtastic battle this week involves former Page 3 Idol Winner Kelly Hall and Egotastic! favorite Rosie Jones, both girls still quite young, extremely vivacious, and most definitely without their tops. Let's get ready to rumble those funbags. Enjoy.

See Much More of Kelly and Rosie Without Clothes »

Sabine Priek and Rhian Sugden Topless Page 3 Battle Awakens Some Primal Instincts

By Bill Swift | January 25, 2012 @ 12:13 am

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Good God I need to see some ripe melons and I need to see them now. If you could peek inside my brain, you'd know that that particular phrase rips right across my hippocampus seventeen times a minute or so. And I know I'm not alone. Oh, yes, there are many of you out there, like 99.4% of you who hear that same foundation-of-the-species instinctual hymnal also chorusing through your domes. We are but victims of our primal urges, honed artfully by nature such that the strongest boob-men have survived the generation, breeding super ridiculously funbag loving male offspring in an ever increasing thirst for mammaries.

And, quench. Why lament when we can rejoice in an simple, but epic battle between a couple of this week's Page 3 hotties, Sabine Priek, a vastly under-appreciated brunette bombshell, and Rhian Sugden, whose name alone is enough to make the pointy hairs on our warmest of cockles stand and deliver.

Four sweet ripe melons battling it out for your affections. Could there be a finer feeling? Enjoy.

See More of Sabine and Rhian Goodness »

Rosie Jones Battles Emily O’Hara In Page 3 Topless Battle

By Bill Swift | January 13, 2012 @ 11:16 am

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We're not going to ask for a hands vote. For one reason, after exposing herself on Miami Beach yesterday, Rosie Jones became about as popular as they come around here, and two, never ask a gentleman ogler to raise his arms without some advanced warning. Could be awkward.

Nevertheless, when we see a couple Britty boobtastic models posing up and off in Page 3, we really must examine them side by side, not to mention top to bottom, and on occasional care-free weekends, from bottom back to top, though it's not recommended for amateurs. Rosie Jones vs. the blonde glamour model entrant, the enchantingly riped Irish melon, Emily O'Hara.

Of course, there are only winners when four funbags go to war. Winners all. Enjoy.

See More More Rosie Hotness »

Lucy Collett Wins Page 3 Idol Contest for 2011; Let’s Celebrate With Topless Photos

By Bill Swift | January 4, 2012 @ 9:05 am

Click to See Lucy Uncensored

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What can you say about a topless hottie competition run by a major tabloid newspaper other than, well, 'Thank you, governor'. The Page 3 Idol competition has produced in the past the sextastic and glamorous winner likes of Keeley Hazell and Lacey Banghard, and, now, in the competition that ought be called Britain's Got Two Big Talents, this year's Page 3 Idol winner is Lucy Collett, a young, though not nekkid novice, ginger who displays her winning portfolio in the current edition of the Sun.

As always, we give great credence to viewer voted competition, as we give great ogles to Lucy's great bodily credences. The people have spoken, the men have leered, and named Lucy Collett their current princess. All hail Lucy. Enjoy.

See More of Past Winners Lacey Banghard and Keeley Hazell »