Harper's Bazaar Magazine Posts:

Gwyneth Paltrow Airbrushed Pale Hotness for Harper’s

By Bill Swift | April 16, 2013 @ 10:24 am

Yes, Gwyneth Paltrow's main occupation these days is giving unsolicited advice on major media matters. And, yes, Harper's Bazaar did airbrush the shizz out of her for their big May 2013 photospread, but ever since seeing Gwyneth Paltrow nekkid, I've always had a crush on the kind of annoying pale blonde actress and model.

What can you do? Lust just finds you where it finds you. Enjoy.

Gwyneth Paltrow Shines in Harper's Bazaar US May 2013

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Jessica Gomes Is Dark and Sultry and Hot All Over in Harper’s

By Bill Swift | March 20, 2013 @ 1:08 pm

Jessica Gomes Hot and Dark Shoot in Harper's Bazaar April 2013

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I would never call any bikini pictures boring. Not of super hot looking women. But I would say that as much as I did peruse the airbrush two-piece instances of hot Australian model Jessica Gomes in SI Swimsuit Editions of the past few years, it's amazing to see her in another light. A darker more passion inducing light in Harper's Bazaar magazine. Looking all kinds of come hither and get into serious trouble with me.

Only brunettes can really pull that off I think. Something magical and troublesome about the raven-haired beauties like Jessica. You know trouble is brewing, but you are hardly going to stop yourself from seeing how naughty it gets. Enjoy.

JESSICA GOMES HAS A BODY BUILT FOR DISPLAYING FINERIES

Jessica Gomes in Cosmopolitan Magazine Australia

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Vanessa Hudgens Just Keeps Getting Hotter, Selena Gomez Keeps Up in Harper’s

By Bill Swift | March 7, 2013 @ 11:33 am

Vanessa Hudgens Shows Some Cleavage at DVF Launch in NYC

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Vanessa Hudgens hit some fashion pimping event last night and made the most of her swelling bosom and blossoming good looks, just looking every bit the coming of age cleavy hottie we can't wait to see in Spring Breakers.

Meanwhile, her co-star and fellow blossomer, Selena Gomez and her little sextastic frame hit the streets in Harper's Bazaar magazine, looking all kinds of wild times grown up her own self.

Selena Gomez Looking Hot in Harper's Bazaar April 2013

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These two girls form two of the tentpoles of Hollywood hotness for the next decade. That's a tent you really want to be under, with Selena and Vanessa, and very little clothing. Enjoy.

Vanessa Hudgens Wicked Hot For Harper’s Bazaar

By Bill Swift | December 7, 2012 @ 11:25 am

Vanessa Hudgens Hot Photoshoot in Harper's Bazaar Arabia December 2012

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I don't think it's fair to label Vanessa Hudgens as an underrated hottie, but let's call her an under the radar hottie. Maybe it's because of her short stature, or her Disney background, but she often doesn't get serious consideration in 'Hottest' categories when such matters are arbitrarily decided. But ever since her days of cellphone picturing her own naughty self, Vanessa has grown from just a naughty young cutie into a real live sextastic grown petite woman.

Featured in the Arabia edition of Harper's Bazaar this month, the brunette beauty gets a little artsy and stylish, but underneath it all, literally, is one little sexy minx we'd like to get to know better. Or as good as you can get to know somebody in like four minutes and thirty seconds betwixt the sheets. Let's give Vanessa her due. Enjoy.

CAN NOT WAIT TO SEE VANESSA AND FRIENDS IN 'SPRING BREAKERS'

Vanessa Hudgens Looks Mighty Fine in a Bikini on Set of Spring Breakers

Selena Gomez Bikini Hot on Set of Spring Breakers

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Barbara Palvin So Wicked Hot (But Could She Be Tainted By The Devil’s Midget?)

By Bill Swift | November 13, 2012 @ 1:02 pm

Barbara Palvin Looks Stunning in Harper Bazaar India November 2012

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On the cusp of wonderful news of the Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber breakup comes some rather tragically horrible news (ever silver lining just has to have a fucking cloud, doesn't it?) that The Devil's Midget may now be seeing and frequenting and invading the personal private corridors of our very newly favorite Victoria's Secret model Barbara Palvin.

Now, before anybody defenestrates themselves into the new life, let's be aware that the dumped Hollywood dude being thrust into the arms of a supermodel is Public Relations 101 in Tinsel Town. Just look how many supermodel 'romances' Leonardo DiCaprio goes through in a year. We're hoping this is the case with our super-lust-inducing Barbara Palvin, featured in this month's Harper's Bazaar India, because the thought of those little self-satisfied weasel paws on this gorgeous Hungarian female might just drive us to insanity.

THIS HOTNESS BE OFF LIMITS TO THAT HIDEOUS TEEN LESBIAN YOUTUBE STAR

Barbara Palvin Sexy Victoria's Secret Designer Collection 2012

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Miranda Kerr Covered Nekkid Ridiculously Hot for Harper’s Bazaar

By Bill Swift | August 9, 2012 @ 10:53 am

Miranda Kerr Covered Nekkid Photoshoot in Harper's Bazaar September 2012

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Miranda Kerr nekkid in only thigh-high leather boots. Yeah, that could be good.

Much gracias and kudos to the fine folks at Harper's Bazaar magazine for their depiction of the high-and-low passion inducing uber-sextastic Miranda Kerrwithout her clothes on. Miranda Kerr is ever super hot. Miranda Kerr without her clothes on, it's an entirely new level. Like, ice cream is good, but ice cream slowly melted on the warm butt of a girl like Miranda Kerr that she orders you to lick, well, that's better.

We're going to need a couple hours to process our true feelings on these new photos. Our imaginations are already quickly passed the point of uncovering her modesty in the photos, we just need to slow down a pace, maybe grab an ice pack. We advise you to proceed with similar caution. Enjoy.

YOU DON'T JUST GET A BODY LIKE MIRANDA'S WITHOUT A LITTLE SWEAT

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Miranda Kerr Riding Crop Delicious in Harper’s Bazaar

By Bill Swift | July 3, 2012 @ 4:46 pm

Miranda Kerr Harper’s Bazaar UK August 2012

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Miranda Kerr Topless

The only thing better than the riding crop -- nothing on at all. 9 Photos »

Now, outside of some drunken furry cosplay, and our pretend-to-be-gynecologist Wednesdays, we generally shy away from kinky costume roleplaying with the ladies. But seeing the uber-sextastic Miranda Kerr in her little black bra hoisting a riding crop in her new Harper's Bazaar U.K. pictorial, well, by golly, time to play naughty stable boy.

Miranda Kerr represents hope. The hope that someday she will dump that Ducati riding underemployed thespianic fop of a husband and come to our doorstep with nothing but her riding crop and a pair of invisible panties and insist that we mow her private lawn. That my friends, is hope. Enjoy.