I’m not sure how long Katy Cocktease has been on concert hiatus. It seems like it’s been at least a couple boyfriends or a marriage ago really. It’s been a while. But, you can’t keep a good girl down, so Katy got decked out in her silly showy costumes and got up and down and down and up on stage in Belfast in her new concert tour.
It’s kind of like her old concert tour in so much as Katy prances about showing off her cleave and legs and various other jiggly parts, but different in so much as it’s brand new different same sounding pop songs. Okay, so it’s mostly the same as last time, but with Katy Cocktease, we’re still bound to ogle. Enjoy.
I’m not exactly sure why Rihanna has named her magical musical tour, 777, though I do know she took a bunch of people with her on the 777 aircraft and maybe Boeing is helping wave the extra baggage fees on her suitcases full of tiny, skimpy outfits she’s wearing during her mini-tour.
Onstage in London, Rihanna pumped out her fist-pumping dance music while we waited for our earplugs to settle fully into our canals so we can take a more focused approach to staring up and down the Bajan diva’s ridiculously toned sultry body. After seeing Christina Aguilera the other night, we needed a bit of a fit–body-pop-star-cleanse, and Rihanna provided just that. She’s never shy about showing skin. And we do give thanks for that. Enjoy.
We’re ever so happy for the vibrant return of vibrantly hot young diva Demi Lovato, who took some ill turns in 2011, but is making the current year her voyeuristic bitch, with a newly refashioned curvy body and back to full time work pleasing tweens around the world with her poppy music and pleasing men around the world with her peeping opportunities.
On stage in Rio, Demi showed why she’s an ogle-worthy force to be reckoned with, and while she didn’t wardrobe malfunction like Miley, or grab her crotch like Rihanna, Demi has her own way of still inducing lust, a little bit old school, a little bit new school, but either way, a visual lesson well worth learning. Enjoy.
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Oh, Selena Gomez, when, oh, when, can we finally be rid of your teen lesbian boyfriend who smells like old cotton candy and finally be together, out in the open, unashamed of the shameful things we obviously will be doing to each other in the dark?
This plan is perhaps still in the dream stages, but how can you not dream about Selena Gomez as she continues her little Latina hotness tour, now bouncing through Brazil, showing various signs that the girl has grown into a young woman. I’m not exactly sure who designed Selena’s new showgirl costumes, but I most definitely want her to be wearing one under her trenchcoat as she arrives at the slip hosting my 11-foot dinghy. Just as long as she doesn’t insist on listening to her own music, we will be more than fine. Enjoy.