Bikinis

Hethielly Beck Wears A Tiny Black Bikini On The Beach in Malibu For 138 Water

It’s mostly hits and more hits with the girls the 138 water slash bikini modeling enterprise keeps rolling out to Malibu each morning for sextastic beachfront shoots. Among those prize winning passion inducers of late is most definitively the Brazilian hottie Hethielly Beck.

Something about that every so tiny black bikini on the alluring Sudamericana that makes me feel a bit parched. I’d die before I spent two bucks on a water, because mama didn’t raise no fools, also I’m extremely cheap, err, thrifty, but if Hethielly told me it makes her hot when I waste money, I’d go in for a couple cases and some lurid smiles back at her. Submission to hot girls is the international language. Like Esperanto, but the beatings are more fun. Hethielly, the table is set, the time is now, the move is yours. Let’s talk tan lines in my Aloe Vera hut. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Chelsea Heath Has Sextastic Intentions on Instagram

It’s not easy breaking out in the world of social media and Internet model sensations. First, you must be hot. You must have a killer fine body. And you must develop a strong following. But how? Oh, tell me, Bill, how? Okay. It all stars with your Instagram account. Wherein you have total control over your skintastic exhibitions, at least up until the point Zuckerberg panics and pulls the nipple kill switch. He is a sensitive billionaire most certainly.

Chelsea Heath seems to have figured out the step one game pretty damn well. Her social media account is rife with alluring selfies sharing her gifts of the boobtastic and visual wonderments related therein. I can tell whether or not I’m going to like somebody within ten seconds of visiting their online accounts. I just sense that Chelsea and I could be good friends, stay up late night, make cocoa, share our dreams and secrets and do so entirely while nekkid embraced in each other’s arms like two desperately cold arctic monkeys. That’s true friendship. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Instagram

Hailey Clausen Bikini Bunny Picture Perfection

Hailey Clausen really is quite the memorable young model. I never forget a face and I never forget a body, meaning I could identify the sextastic bikini bodied Hailey through just the sense of touch. And my sixth sense of tingle. Oh, what a world it would be if that were allowed. For now, just the leering.

The good folks at Beach Bunny who have an uncanny sense of picking just the right hot model for their bikini lines snatches up Hailey and told her to do what she does best. Make bikinis look amazing. I’d call this a success. I’m not sure how women select their two piece wears, but you could do worse than picking out the suits that are currently making a million men semi-catatonic. Of course, Hailey might have a little something to do with that. But go with the bikini gods and cross your fingers. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Beach Bunny

Jessica Grace Smith Bikini Boobtastic Stylings on Set in Australia

Jessica Grace Smith is that Down Under hottie on Home and Away in Australia. Technically I think she’s a Kiwi born and bred, and I don’t want angry Southern Hemispherics coming after me for my poor understanding of world geography. Relatively speaking, it’s not even my weakest subject. In contrast, my strong suit is sextastic thespianics in bikinis filming on the beach and showing off their boobtastic bodily wares. You may also recognize Jessica from Spartacus, God of the Arena. Or just perhaps a figment of your most high minded imagination.

The Aussie soaps love to show their girls in bikinis and make beach scenes a routine part of their backdrops. Smart move and a big part of the reason their shows provide a wonderful minor league system for grown up Australian models and actresses. I predict wonderful things for Jessica Grace Smith’s future. Some people read the tea leaves, I read the ta-ta’s. I’d bet you my assessments are more accurate. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Splash

 

Nina Agdal Bikini Picture Epic Hotness for Beach Bunny

Danish Delight Nina Agdal might just be my favorite carbon based life form on this planet. And that includes beer, which is most definitely carbon based, and if you drink enough of it, quite lively. She’s just so perfectly put together, as if angels came down from heaven and said let’s make something that will literally make men turn to jelly. And out popped Nina Agdal. And the world was never quite the same.

As you know, the entire genius of marketing bikini and swimwear lines rests entirely on one decision, securing an uber-sextastic hot bodied crazy alluring lady like Nina Agdal to wear your line in promotional shoots. That’s it. I’m sure there’s some smaller details like the 5 P’s and 10 C’s or what ever you crazy kids are going into debt at college to learn, but it’s really just about saying look how damn amazing our bikinis look on Nina Agdal, they will on you too. That last part is called the fudge, in street parlance. But it works. Now where’s my Marketing Executive of the Year award? My 10 and Under bowling trophy is getting lonely on the mantle. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Beach Bunny

Masha Gutik And Ana Bikini Body Extraordinary for Wildfox Lookbook

What is a look book? Well, I take from that I’m supposed to look. Check. How can one not spend a solid several minutes gazing upon the twin lovely models Masha Gutik and Ana Kai tasked with pimping the shizz out of Wildfox swimwear. They may not be the biggest names in bikini modeling, but they will most definitely break your hearts. Really the sign of a tremendously gifted woman.

The only thing finer than one incredible looking sextastic model is two, touching, preening, posing as if one. Naturally, it’s a scientific fact that all female models will canoodle in a playful if not directly sexual manner when working together. I’m not one to question science. I’d like to think these girls have feelings for one another. But if it’s just blind lust of each other’s superb boobtastic and hot hiney bottoms, that works as well. Forgive me, I need to buy some bikinis. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Mark Hunter For Wildfox

Kennedy Summers Bikini Hot Playmate of the Year for 138

Holy blonde smokes. Kennedy Summers just broke parts of me that you can’t mend with a cast with this rather epic boobtastic bikini shoot for the creepy 138 Water people. They do hire the hotties in the two pieces to splish splash in the freezing winter ocean waters. Some days they just strike magic. Kennedy Summers and that outstanding PMOY body of hers is the cape and wand.

I’d like to Kennedy is reveling in her own sextastic despite the freezing cold temps, though I’m certain she’s mostly putting on an act. That just makes her more alluring in my book. I count on women who can fake being happy for the better part of my relationships. Honesty is vastly overrated among human romantic endeavors, let alone tosses between the sheets. Kennedy, I respect your mind and your body, not necessarily in that order, but let’s no quibble. I have warm blankets and cocoa. Now, let’s just get you out of that wet bikini. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet