Taco Bell’s Waffle Taco Is Coming

Taco Bell is rolling out a new breakfast menu March 27th making stoners and the obese very excited. The menu will feature a crunch taco, (basically a hash brown brick with sausage, eggs, and cheese in a tortilla) and some cinnamon balls. But the item that most people are discussing is the waffle taco. What in the name of the dark fast food gods is that? It's a waffle folded in half to make a taco filled with bacon or sausage, eggs, cheese, and comes with a pack of maple syrup. It's pretty much the thing you eat when you've finally given up on life. It's suicide at $3.99, only you don't die right away. No. It clogs your arteries, destroys your liver and pancreas, and basically annihilates your colon. At best this thing is going to give you massive diarrhea, like the kind where you have to put Gold Bond powder in your shorts just so you can sit down. At worst, putting this thing in your mouth is like embracing the dark angel of death.

Or maybe it's delicious? I don't know. When it comes out I'll try it and report back. Yes, dear reader I'm willing to literally bite the bullet on this one.