Scare Yourself Silly with the Opening Minutes of ‘IT’ (VIDEO)

If you're one of the three dozen people besides me in America that hasn't seen IT yet, you can watch the opening minutes of the film above. They will serve as exhibits A through Z in my arguments on why I will never see this flick. Holy mother of pearl, that is some scary stuff right there. Me as a kid would've been like, "Hey eager clown hiding the sewer, you've ticked roughly all of the boxes on my run screaming list, so that's what I'll be doing now."

I know, Georgie's a special little guy who probably didn't know better than to not talk to clowns in sewers. Either way, this is the stuff of my nightmares. Literally. I had a scary clown dream last weekend because I saw the stupid poster when I was at the movie theater. It was embarrassing, but thankfully not embarrassing enough to refrain from sharing.

Oh well, just because I'll never see this movie doesn't mean it's not good. I'm sure it's great, especially if you're into this whole sort of thing. Me, I'll stay home and watch basically any other Stephen King adaptation. Except that awful Shining remake with the guy from Wings. I'll take my chances with the sewer clown before I sit through that dreck again.