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  • It's Game Control, Jim, But Not As We Know It
     
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      It’s Game Control, Jim, But Not As We Know It

      If you were to ask our acquaintance(/ABSOLUTELY NOT homosexual lover, pay no heed to the lies the lice-ridden bastard may proffer you) Hobo Joe, he would maintain that video game control reached its lofty zenith with the bosom-infused ingenuity you see here. (“My favorite part is when his hands are on her boobs,” Joe drawled through his two and-a-half remaining teeth, drooling on his shirt and removing his piss-stained pants. Less eloquent than the former, but the sentiment is largely the same.) Microsoft, it transpires, would disagree. Indeed, they would raise their wrapped-in-dollar-bills-like-an-Egyptian-mummy middle finger at us with gleeful gusto, and exhort LOOK AT OUR LATEST CRAZY SHENANIGANS. As IGN reported this week, Bill’s boys have filed an application for a 'Wearable Electromyography-Based Controller’, which is a large word indeed right there. Further, this will serve “… for measuring muscle activity, to interact with and control computing devices … [including] game consoles, televisions or other multimedia devices." In summation, something akin to their fetid Kinect, sans shit-tastic factor, may be impending. Hit IGN’s link in the article for possible ramifications of this enigmatic technology.

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