brian-mcgee - November 7, 2017
I'm not entirely sure who Paige Mobley is, but I know two things for sure. She's not the main character in The Jungle Book and she also does not turn into a Gremlin if you feed her after midnight. It turns out that Paige is a model from Michigan who was once a contestant on America's Next Top Model.
Thank goodness for the internet. Without it, I'd be sitting here all day trying to figure out why I should know who Paige is. I suppose I wouldn't have even come across her in the first place without the internet, but it never hurts to take a minute and be thankful that we have a world of knowledge at our fingertips. And porn.
Paige Mobley can now proudly count me among her many fans. I'm excited to see whatever it is that she does next, even if it's some insufferable pop album that makes me want to stomp on my gonads in a pair of Wolverine boots. Be good to your gonads, it's the last thing my Uncle Chubb said to me before he rolled off Niagra Falls in a barrel. Honestly, it's still the best advice he ever gave me. R.I.P. Uncle Chubb.
Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News / Backgrid USA