Jasmine Tookes Bikini Body Exhibition Time Along the Miami Beach Shoreline

Jasmine Tookes has strutted the Victoria's Secret catwalk before. A fun place to walk no doubt, but not nearly as fun for as as catching our lingerie wearing pimpstresses more candidly captured and clad in bikinis along some sunny beach as in Miami, the sandy home of international hotness. Jasmine chose a lovely lavender to ensure we didn't miss her long lean and sultry present along the beach. A nice reminder that Victoria's Secret could use perhaps some more hot women of color in their lingerie hawking enterprise.

If I'm being honest, we cut Jasmine's boyfriend out of all these pictures. People often ask me why I do that and if it's related to not wanting stupid guys to ruin photos or if it's just a case of me being jealous of men who snoggle women well beyond my reach. The answer is yes. Enjoy

Kim Kardashian Braless Knockers Celebrate a Birthday in Sin City

Kim Kardashian turned 34. Various body parts, harder to determine age without forensic pathology. But Kim and her parts celebrated big time in Vegas over the weekend her birthday and more so the fact that she was getting paid to celebrate her birthday. They just don't hand that privilege out to anyone. It helps if you promise to being along your healthy humpers and show them off to the entire Vegas nightclub audience who has to pay to join your little soiree.

I always had trouble getting people to show up to my birthday parties, let alone paying a cover to get in. Probably has something to do with that dress she's wearing. I know I couldn't pull that off. I'm assuming it was designed especially for Kim and her less than 34 year old yummy yams. If only she could get 34 of them, then we could've have blown them out and applauded. Kim, you are not shy about showing off your moneymakers. I will give you that. Enjoy.

Jessica Chastain and Anne Hathaway Stellar Glam Hot for Interstellar Premiere

Interstellar is already off to a strong start with lady co-stars Jessica Chastain and Anne Hathaway both looking mighty fine at the L.A. premiere of the space odyssey over the weekend. The film itself looks rather trippy, I might need to sneak in my own nachos and cheese. I'd bring plenty for either the ginger or brunette hotties that showed up to the event all decked out and looking leading ladyish. There is something about glamorous old Hollywood that gets my motor revving.

Jessica and Anne are thespianics first and foremost. I know sometimes these kinds of artists rub the public the wrong way, Anne for sure. But I think it's important to remember that creative types of some skill level often tend to be slightly rough around the edges. Which is why I consider myself fortunate to be born with only middling skills, like a mid level elf who can rejoice in his work while Santa carries all the stress around his belly. Ignorance is bliss. As would be a sweaty sandwich between Jessica and Anne at an after party. The odds on that are about the same as life on Mars, low, but definitely worth investing billions to find out for sure. Enjoy.

Adrianne Curry Topless Artistic Treasures on Nekkid Type Display in Kendal Carson Photoshoot

 

I'm the first guy to admit I don't get themes and motifs and anything artistic above the finger painting level. I really was a finger painting master up through the second grade when they found a color matching the paint on my index finger smudged on a sensitive area of a female classmates body. In my defense, she was the best looking girl in second grade and she completely understood my need for Picasso like explorations of line and space. However stupendously slow my artistic sensibilities are conversely how inexorably drawn I am to topless mostly nekkid hotties like exercise and cosplay queenie Adrianne Curry who got quite unclothed and bare boobtastic for a variety of noteworthy looks in a preview of this Kendal Carson photoshoot.

It's certainly unique. You mix in all these heavily crafted looks with the taut toned and tight body of Adrianne Curry and her faptastic yams and you have something that reminds me of  both classical Greek sculpture and a show I had to keep putting in quarters to keep operating the last time I was in New York. What a glorious female form. Consider me artistically inspired once again. I'm going to need a lot of finger paint. Enjoy.

Maria Menounos, Paris Hilton, and Mindy Robinson Lead Booty and Boobtastic Tequila Halloween Party Hotness

Someday, I'd love to run a tequila brand like Casaamigos and have all the hotties in Hollywood show up to my place in cleavy and booty hot costumes that make little sense for grown ups, but every sense in the world for gentleman oglers. I'm not sure at what point Halloween went from being a silly kids holiday centered around cheap costumes and snagging Kit Kats in a pillow case to six-figure parties with adults decked out in professional makeup and wardrobes flashing their flesh, I'm just glad it happened. Halloween has become the single biggest exhibitionist holiday of the year for so many lovely ladies.

The bevy of ghoulish beauties at the Casaamigos party includes Billionaire Barbie and her pushed up mams, Maria Menounos and one G.I. mega booty, Mindy Robinson and her hot all over female form, Kate Hudson squeezably zombie butt, and much more. Granted, it's not even Halloween until next week, but in places where everybody has their own personal makeup artist and wardrobe assistant, you can bet Halloween becomes and entire week or more of opportunity to dress up. It's almost like an office party Hollywood style. Enjoy.

Jennifer Lopez And Iggy Azalea Going Booty To Booty At The We Can Survive Concert

Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea had a booty off onstage at the We Can Survive concert in LA. The veteran buttmaster Jennifer showed Iggy how the big girls shake their thing. Jen wore a short silver outfit that showed off plenty of that legendary butt. Iggy, who is no slouch in the booty department, was wearing a pair of short shorts and stockings. They made a splash a couple of months ago by shaking their rumps in a sweaty room for Iggy's aptly named Booty video. I watched that thing on a loop. Maybe it's the Latin man in me but I was transfixed by those bouncing gluts. The two of them should go on tour and call it Bootypalooza or something like that. I would shell out serious money to see that and I'm not really a fan of either of their musics.

I'm glad that Jen has taken Iggy on as her butt padawan. She has much to learn but maybe one day she will be as powerful as her bootymaster.

Kat Torres Sells Some Fancy Water In A Sexy Bikini

Brazilian hottie Kat Torres did a hot bikini shoot for 138 Water in Malibu. She wore a very revealing bikini that showed off her choice assets. I've said before that I don't know how they do it but Brazil produces some of the most beautiful women on the planet. Kat is definitely in that category. She's thin, tight, and gorgeous. Her funbags are just the right size for her body so she doesn't look ridiculous with some over-sized fakies. Instead, her boobies are of the perky-pert variety. But let's talk about her booty. It is a sight to behold and luckily the bikini shows off a lot of it. No one does butts like the Brazilians. Have you ever seen footage of their Carnivale? It's like heaven for a butt man. In the pics Kat also does a lot of high sidekicks which kind of give her a bit of camel toe. This is good...very good.

I don't know what marketing genius over at 138 Water came up with the idea of having hot women in bikinis hold their product but they deserve a promotion.