Irina Shayk And Adriana Lima Hug Dreamily At The Chopard Gold Party

I don’t know much about the Chopra watch brand other than I’m guessing their Gold timepieces cost more than my Hello Kitty knockoff Swatch and I failed to receive my invitation to their swank bit of party night in Cannes. Meanwhile, half of the hot models in the city seemed to get their parchment copy with time, date, and location. Hmm, this could be a conspiracy.

There were a number of hot and lovelies gracing the red carpet of this event including Sara Sampaio, Michelle Rodriguez, and Lindsay Ellingson, but when Irina Shayk and Adriana Lima hugged I nearly spit out my gonads. Wait, what? I mean, it was a very emotional and heartfelt moment that reminded me of the humanity inside all of us, also, the boners. I’m just being honest. Those two girls hugging comes straight out of my many a REM sleep night fantasy where supermodels hug each other then rock-paper-scissor to see who gets the first round of Uncle Bill magic. Maybe a hair pulling instead of rock-paper-scissors. My dreams are flexible. So are these girls. I bet this party was better than horrible. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

Julija Steponaviciute Topless Athletics All Taut and Bothered On The Beach

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Not to be confused with my future bride Edita Vilkeviciute, the lovely lass and brunette statuesque Lithuanian babe Julija Steponaviciute is a couple years young and very much the tall hot bodied equal of my future betrothed. I know the names are a challenge, but if you can learn them for your favorite NBA basketball stars, you can learn them for wicked hot lanky fashion models from the Baltic with little to no fear or removing their tops for added passion inducement.

Featured topless for the current edition of Elle Belgium, Julija shows off her taut and tight sporty side, which naturally needs not include a bra or top. I wish more of our athletic diva would take note of such advice. Tops are definitely optional during sporting events. Let Julija be your guide. Girls like her don’t just run along topless on the beach every day now. But if you find a beach where this is the case, I’d just go ahead and pitch your tend and stay awhile. You’ve found heaven on earth. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Elle Belgium

Amanda Seyfried White Panties Peek For Vogue

Oh you saucy minx. Our Nordic petite princess Amanda Seyfried certainly has been largely out of the public eye of late, but she must be coming out again soon in theaters because her compelling and alluring pale form has started to hit the newsstands again, including this feminine little bit of panties flashing in Vogue magazine.

Amanda Seyfried is one of those girls you wish could be your girlfriend for a month because, let’s face it, that first month really is the best and even your dream girl might start to chafe you a bit after a month. Okay, maybe two, because she travels for work. And if she promises to flash her white panties around the house on the hour. There has to be rules. Without rules there is just chaos. And sloppy lovemaking and donuts, for one solid month. Then who knows. We can break up and get back together a couple times because we miss the sex, and the donuts. I’m kind of ready for this, Amanda. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Vogue

Jemima Kirke Photoshoot Instagram Tease

Jemima Kirke from the show Girls also happens to be good friends with show creator Lena Dunham. Hold that against her if you wish. I’m more interested in Jemima the randy girl who likes to take revealing photos, as in this Instagram tease set where Jemima’s lady parts are covered tantalizingly so by objects who I’d like to wish away from this earth.

Jemima is by no means a shy girl so I’m supposing this tease and cover routine is something of a commentary or necessity related to Zuckerberg fearing women’s bodies as a cat does the water. Albeit, if thrown into the water, a cat will actually swim rather than spasm, feint, and drown in his own fears. I think. Jemima has quite the nekkid feature ready body and we have and will see more of in the future. But, for now, we settle on a hot bodied tease. There’s something to be said for foreplay and that thing to be said is, ‘When exactly is this over so the good stuff can start?’. Please don’t utter that aloud to your wife or girlfriend. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Cass Bird

Lucia Kopacikova Sultry Slovakian Sextastic In Lingerie

Have I ever mentioned to you before how much I love supremely hot Slovakian girls in lingerie? What? Ten thousand times? Get out of here, that’s exaggerated by at least five times. But Lucia Kopacikova, well, hot damn girl, you put the achy in Slovakian.

Featured in this Henrik Adamsen lingerie shoot, the tall, blonde, and beautiful Eastern European model puts on slinky sultry show that ought to be illegal, or perhaps mandatory legal in a more perfect world, where the mere sight of Lucia might send a man off to make twenty to forty children in the name of relief. The way Lucia primps and preens in these bras and panties and nighties is simply unreal. Yet real, which is so much better than unreal. I bet they feel super soft. I’d risk losing an eye to find out. I really just need one. Lucia, do you see what you’re doing to me? I surrender, now, use me as you wish. Damn, again. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Henrik Adamsen

Charlie Riina Wardrobe Malfunction During A Photoshoot In LA

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The delightfully tanned, hot, and ta-ta splendid Cannuckian model Charlie Riina suffered a wardrobe malfunction of sorts shooting for the bottled water company devious folks in nothing but a leather jacket and a pair of jeans. Even The Fonz knew you had to wear a shirt under the leather jacket, so it’s hard to believe Charlie didn’t have some inkling her perfectly splendid funbags would be making some kind of grand entrance during the course of this sun-filled photo snapping. These aren’t exactly photos for her Christian Mingle profile, though that would get you many bites.

Charlie has been one of our favorite of these H20 models and former Bunny topless lovelies to be repeatedly out there by the water pimping the water by way of scintillating body. She’s got that in spades. And thanks to what may or may not technically be a malfunction, one epic pair of lady melons to boot. Intentional or accidental, my eyeballs remain quite pleased. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

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Rachel Mortenson Spilling Over Bikini Top in Agency Test Shots

When you’re an up and coming model, your various outlets and agencies are going to take test shots to size you up for potential. Here’s a look at some of the early shots of L.A. model Rachel Mortenson now working for Guess. Do you see any potential? Yes, I know, a boatload.

The wicked hot boobtastic blonde is spilling over and nearly out of her bikini top which pretty much qualifies her most jobs on earth, including hot fashion model for which her toolbox also seems to be overflowing. There are a number of crazy alluring women in this world, but only a select few have the compelling looks and ridiculously hot body and that mysterious X quality that takes them into the professional stratosphere. Rachel Mortenson, you’ve been places, you are going to even more. If you’d like to stop by my place for a lemonade and a nap along the way, you don’t have to ask twice. My door is always open. I just wish smoking hot blondes walked through more often. I’m sick of the vagrants. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Agency Polaroids