Sam Robeson - January 30, 2018
Lady Gaga has officially run out of causes to support now that the gays have gotten sick of her and the Dove girl sisterhood feel she took things too far with her weight. Her last-ditch attempt at supporting a cause is standing behind her aunt who's been dead for a thousand years, as her new music video for a stripped-down version of her song Joanne states in dramatic fashion:
Joanne was my father's sister who died at the age of 19 from the auto-immune disease.
My father was only 15 when she passed away.
For the twelve people who bought Joanne, this will surely be poignant supplementary material. Most of us barely care about our own dead relatives, but because Gaga is the nucleus and we are but wayward pleb electrons only sustained by her force, we somehow care greatly about her gross dead aunt. Watch Gaga hitch herself to whatever she thought would get clicks and let us know how much you miss her aunt in the comments. Or exactly when she transitioned into Tom Petty.
Photo Credit: YouTube / Pacific Coast News / Splash News / Backgrid USA