Nine-Year-Old Gives Birth in Mexico. MTV Development Execs Start Counting the Money

I used to not want to go to Mexico City because of the kidnappings. But now there's a whole new reason to not want to go to South of the Border. Authorities are reporting that looks like a nine-year-old girl in Mexico City has given birth to a baby. Authorities are reporting that a 9-year-old girl gave birth last week to a baby in the city of Guadalajara. They are on the lookout for the purported father, a 17-year-old who has not been seen around town since the birth occurred. Probably because he's hunkered down somewhere studying for his SATs.

News like this must make execs at MTV salivate down their cheeks like one of Pavlov's dogs when the dinner bell went off. If the network likes one thing, it's ratings. If the network likes two things, it's ratings and ratings by showing the most depraved nature of mankind. If Buckwild, Teen Mom, 16 and Pregnant, Jersey Shore and The Hills weren't enough evidence that the network that once revolutionized the music and entertainment industry has basically just given up in order to appeal to the basest elements of America's youth in its desire to be seen by any means necessary, even if it's a celebration of how ignorant you are, then they can finally place that nail in their coffin with their newest show Pre-Teen Mom. 

Can't you see them flying this girl and her family to live in some Real World-style house in the Valley, where they coax interviews out of the girl and her parents where they come off as really dumb immigrants? Wouldn't that be hilarious? Can she juggle parenting with elementary school? And think of the great hour-long My Super Sweet Quinceañera they could get out of it? I'm being facetious, of course. But isn't it kind of strange that while I may be kidding around, you can also definitely imagine this actually happening?

Though knowing MTV they'd probably recast a white girl with vocal fry as the Mexican girl and the baby daddy with the guy who plays Edward from Twilight down on Hollywood Blvd.