TV & FILM
brian-mcgee - November 7, 2017
It's good news bad news time guys... The bad news is that if you got dragged to Fifty Shades of Grey and Fifty Shades Darker, you're gonna get dragged to Fifty Shades Freed this coming Valentine's Day. The good news, however, is that this will be the last of them. Thankfully they didn't pull a Twilight/Hunger Games-split the last book into two movies nonsense. I'm not quite sure how they were able to restrain themselves, but they did it, and we finally get to reap some sort of reward from this franchise.
Dakota Johnson and some mocap-created hunk probably played by Andy Serkis are back in action in the third and THANKFULLY final film in this godforsaken trilogy. There will probably be lots and lots of super R-rated action in the bedroom, despite the books featuring borderline porn-worthy sex scenes, complete with all the stilted dialogue nobody likes in porn.
If you're holding out hope that this will be "the good one" in the series, I should remind you that there's no chance of anything in this franchise being considered "good." Anyway ladies, get your rocks off starting Valentine's Day 2018. Gentlemen, thank the good lord above that this is the last one. Side note, how do you think Don Johnson feels knowing that virtually every guy he knows has probably jerked it to his daughter?