bill-swift - November 21, 2017
Helen Briggs is twenty-two and trying to make the most of her fifteen minutes of U.K. MTV reality show fame by pumping up the volume of her public displays of exhibitionism by way of boobtastic reveals. Why not put your best funbags forward at this moment in your life when paparazzi are snapping away each time you hit the London clubs? That's rhetorical. You definitely must.
Briggs isn't exactly clawing her way to the top of the innate talent pool. She's bouncing her way to the top of the must see mammarial shows put on routinely by reality show stars on both sides of the pond. These massive sweater puppies unleashed are the silver lining to the socially destructive and morbidly bland reality show fare dominating popular media of the past decade. It's like learning you have a tumor, but your doctor is a busty bikini model wearing no bra. Mixed bag.
Helen Briggs isn't out for decorum, she's out to win. A sheer and revealing dress that you can't find in department stores is just the ticket. Blue hair not even needed, Helen. More teats, more sweets. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
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