Sam Robeson - July 7, 2017
White trash and liberated social media prostitutes can agree on the importance of multitasking while breastfeeding. Appalachian teen mom hill people have a rotating carousel of cousins suckling on their meth-laced curdled tit milk. Without double tasking, they'd have no time to scratch off lottery tickets on front porches. Social media sensations need to hold an iPhone in one hand to film themselves while breastfeeding to prove that they exist. If a baby sucks on a tit and no one sees it on social media, did he really ever suck on a tit? No. The mother and child simply evaporate into the ether.
Sex-positive mommy blogger Tasha Maile put white trash to shame when she touted getting fucked by her husband while simultaneously breastfeeding her three-month-old baby. "That's cultural appropriation." - Trash. Maile didn't get enough mileage out of her 2015 confessional YouTube video, and is back to defend her nuclear family orgy to anyone who gives a shit:
From what I remember, I remember sleeping with my ex-husband and my son was on me breastfeeding and we would have sex from behind or something. There’s nothing bad about making love at all, ever.
The last sentence being Bill Cosby's mantra. Maile claims that her baby was going through a clingy phase and would get fussy if put down. Also called being a baby. Maile took this as the go-ahead to have an Eyes Wide Shut party in the bedroom with her husband and child.
Mothers get to be a little kooky with their children. God or Mother Nature or Satan decided that in order to multiply we need to incubate larvae inside females - who are to be torn to shreds once the spawn reach nine months. The thrill of breastfeeding in public satisfies a need to be acknowledged. These veiny masticated tits are your problem too. But having a fluid-swapping party with a baby is another story. Maile has amassed half a million followers appreciative of her alternative child-rearing techniques. Imagine what she has in store for them when her kid reaches eighteen.
Photo Credit: YouTube
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