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Lena Dunham Workout Shamed

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Lex Jurgen - March 17, 2017

Lena Dunham has been working out under the discreet care of Tracy Anderson, fitness guru to the world's most pretentious celebrity clientele. The Bosc pear shaped Dunham expressly noted she was not working out to lose weight. In Dunham's opinion as an Oberlin theater grad, there is no correlation between weight and health. They mocked Galileo with his little theory on the sun. This seems metaphorically in the same ballpark.

When you show up to a photo op looking noticeably more slender than your Big Hero 6 self currently being railed on HBO Sunday nights, people are going to talk. Outlets like CNN and Entertainment Tonight fumbled to outdo each other with body positive compliments for Dunham. It pissed off Dunham supporters. Nobody calls our leader less grotesque. Hashtag fight.

Addicts don't really want other addicts to get clean. AA is a gathering of people secretly wishing slip ups on their fellow congregants. It's like a room full of Asian kids taking the SATs. That's racist. The SATs I mean.

If Dunham wasn't such a smug twat, you could almost feel sorry for her trapped in a self-serving rhetorical bubble where working out costs her fan credibility. Like a ghetto child ridiculed for taking school seriously. Only this involves curtailing the Sara Lee sinful cheesecake singles and eighteen hundred a month on exclusive trainer fees. A slimmed down Lena Dunham is the perfect opportunity to remind yourself that being fat was never really what you hated about Lena Dunham.

 

Photo Credit: FameFlyNet 

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