Kylie Jenner Back In The Girdle Again

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Sam Robeson - March 26, 2018

If the herbal tea cancer laxatives you buy off a Jenndashian's Instagram account don't help you shed the pounds, then fear not, because the brothel sisterhood intermittently pimps a wide variety of girdles. After what has been way too long of a hiatus from shilling girdles, Kylie Jenner is back at it. It's a good day. There's just something about a Jenndashian in a back alley organ crunching waist trainer that I find so peaceful. Maybe it's because where I'm from in East Tennessee the premiere shopping destination was a 1980's Krogers in a burned down strip mall that was turned into an As Seen On TV store, and I'm just feeling nostalgic because this is the Hollywood version of that. Or maybe seeing someone who deems her life as aspirational stoop so low as to sell one of the bleakest products on the planet is just so right. A Jenndashian in a girdle. Seriously, is there anything better? Maybe. This caption:

my girl @premadonna87hooked me up with the @waistgangsocietysnap back package. #ad waistgang has the BEST quality snap back products. make sure you get your package & follow @waistgangsociety to join & keep up the journey together. tag us in photos, and head over to NOW! Use code (Kylie) for an exclusive discount & I can keep up with your progress #waistgangsociety #waistgang #fitness #whatwaist



Death of a Slut. Tabloids dug deep to give Kylie flak for wearing this "Waist Gang Society" thing, with Us Weekly even consulting with fake Dr. Cynthia Robbins, who alleges that the squishing of the abdomen is unhealthy for a new mother. With a Jenndashian it's either that or getting your lard sucked out and injected into your ass by someone actually willing to do the procedure - so a Tijuana veterinarian - so the waist trainer seems like a safer option. May 2018 be filled with Jenndashians looking like stupid whores in girdles.



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Photo Credit: Instagram

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