Kendall Jenner Gets a Range Rover for Her Sweet Sixteen; Can a Scandalous Teen Sham Wedding Be Far Behind?

You know what I got for my 16th birthday? I got a lecture from my girlfriend about how sex was too important to experiment with before marriage. I knew the minute she went to bible camp that we were through, but that one still hurt. On a more pleasant Sweet 16 note, Kendall Jenner got a $75K Range Rover, which since it came from Kris Jenner, you can probably consider more as an investment in her daughter's future drawing power than a gift, but, still pretty sweet ride for the day you turn street legal.

Despite the latest Kardashian Mafia publicity backfire and Kim's crocodile purse tears, America's favorite silicon-injected licensed merchandise barons got together and locked up a Sunset Boulevard hotel for Kendall to celebrate the taller, skinnier, prettier teen sister's ever-increasing ability be an earner on her own corner soon. We still believe there's some window of opportunity to Free Kendall Jenner, but it's closing ever so quickly. Enjoy.