Katie Holmes Flashes Knees, Tom Cruise Goes Defcon Four

Katie Holmes went off the reservation last night, strutting about like a strumpet in dress with a hemline that clearly rode above her knee, flashing the gams sure to excite the male of the species. Despite the covering presence of an overcoat in the height of summer, several inches of skin were clearly visible on Katie Holmes, causing husband, Tom Cruise, to stay up through the night, fashioning a scarlet-hued "A" to be sewn onto all of Katie's clothing. Nevertheless, while Tom purchased three-dozen pair of mom jeans and over-sized flannel shirts for his imprisoned princess, we the ogling male audience appreciate the risk taken by our favorite Stepford Wife and wonder if a full-arm view or maybe a bare neck can be far behind. We shall light a candle.

Photo credit: INF Photo / pacificcoastnewsonline.com / Splash News