Kanye’s Insurance Payout Is Nuts

Kanye West sure seems nuts. Like Kim Kardashian sure seemed robbed. In eerily similar actuarial circumstances, West stands to earn a massive insurance payout for unpaid expenses and future lost revenue on the entire remainder of his Pablo Tour scheduled to run six more weeks. More than thirty million if he can receive a psychosis diagnosis from the doctors. He would have to prove he didn't do anything stupid to put himself in such a mental state. That would mean drugs. Or marrying a chick you fell in love with while watching her sex tape and fucking Amber Rose. It might've been simpler to cry carpal tunnel and commit to a wrist brace.

Kim Kardashian has decided not to tell her three-and-a-half year old North West that daddy's in the hospital. Merely to issue extensive press releases through the hard hitting reporters at E! about how she's sitting by her husband in the hospital. Recovery from saying Donald Trump isn't such a bad guy into a microphone doesn't happen overnight. What your kids don't know won't hurt them. And your kids will not know a ton.

The more cynical have made note of how often the men in this family seem to be rushed to the hospital. The less intelligent call it a curse. The more savvy know it to be the result of what inevitably happens every time a man gets into bad pussy. Statistically speaking, black men are still safer in Chicago than Calabasas.

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