Jessica Alba Tame and Sweet and Ever Hot for Redbook

I'll be the first to admit this is a rather innocent portrayal of the uber MILFtastic Jessica Alba for the ladies magazines. But I'll be the second to insist that anything Alba gets my motors running, my boat set to sea, and me figuring out how to pull down the shades with just my teeth.

Shot by James White, these rather family oriented photos of the wildly attractive Jessica Alba are simply how I imagine her looking in our virtual Sundays together in the park while everyone stops and stares and quietly mumbles, what the hell is she doing with that guy and couldn't she do better. That would make me so happy. Jessica, let's do this. I'll put on my seersucker suit. You come in a summer dress with your billions in clean baby diaper fortunes and we'll join forces in a picnic of sex and sandwiches. I'm in, you? Enjoy.