Humor

"Mad Max" Mario Kart

News | May 25, 2015, 12:08 pm

"Mad Max" Mario Kart

I have always been a big fan of the Mario Kart games since way back in the day. They are pure video games. No long quests like the Legend of Zelda or complicated controls like Halo. No, you just drive around a crazy track and try and keep Waluigi from hitting you with a Koopa shell. They are what... Read More

Nintendo Hires Bowser As New VP

News | May 22, 2015, 11:43 am

Nintendo Hires Bowser As New VP

In the pantheon of Nintendo's storied past there are few villains as loved and hated as Bowser. Ever since the first Mario Brothers game way back in the 80's, we've enjoyed the antics of the fire-breathing turtle-dinosaur. He was even played by the great Dennis Hopper in the catastrophically bad... Read More

2016 Presidential Race Starts With Hilary Clinton Porn Parody

News | May 21, 2015, 1:47 pm

2016 Presidential Race Starts With Hilary Clinton Porn Parody

It's over a year away but the 2016 presidential race is already starting. Whether you are a Democrat, Republican, Independent, or you just don't care one thing is for sure, it's all we're going to friggin' hear about for the next year and a half. It's relentless. But there is a new tradition that... Read More

Peter Dinklage Sings About "Game Of Thrones" Dead Characters

News | May 20, 2015, 12:27 pm

Peter Dinklage Sings About "Game Of Thrones" Dead Characters

I always felt that I had a reasonably good idea about what was going to happen on Game of Thrones since I read the books. I knew how and who was going to die. It gave me a sort of smugness and self-absurdness. No matter what I knew that so and so was still alive in the books. All that is out the... Read More

Wonderfully Horrible Netflix Instant Films: "Big Trouble In Little China"

News | May 19, 2015, 10:47 am

Wonderfully Horrible Netflix Instant Films: "Big Trouble In Little China"

When you are young, there are movies that you just love. Films that you watch over and over again until your parents want to kill themselves. For me, one of those movies was Big Trouble in Little China. A lot of times you look back at these films as an adult and think, "Why the hell did I like that... Read More

Mustache Implants Are The New Boob Job

News | May 18, 2015, 11:12 am

Mustache Implants Are The New Boob Job

Middle Eastern men are lining up by the thousands to get mustache transplants. It's become so popular that some plastic surgeons in Turkey claim to do more mustache transplants than boob jobs, (we do not approve). Why? In the Middle East mustaches are seen as signs of virility and manliness. Many... Read More

Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: Left Behind

News | May 15, 2015, 2:04 pm

Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: Left Behind

Back in the mists of time known as the 90's, a Christian fiction book series came out that transcended the genre to become an international bestseller. That was the Left Behind series which tells a fictionalized version of what many Evangelical Christians believe is what is about to happen to hasten... Read More

Scientists Create Dino-Chicken/Hasten Our Doom

News | May 14, 2015, 12:56 pm

Scientists Create Dino-Chicken/Hasten Our Doom

We all know that dinosaurs have more in common with modern birds than they do with reptiles. Some scientists even believe that dinosaurs sported feathers rather than scales and fur. But 65 million years ago Jesus rode down on an asteroid or whatever and wiped the dinosaurs out. The survivors slowly... Read More

The New Hamburglar Just Gets Weirder And Weirder

News | May 13, 2015, 1:52 pm

The New Hamburglar Just Gets Weirder And Weirder

Last week I told you about how McDonald's is trying to appeal to, I guess men like me in their mid to late thirties, by updating the Hamburglar into a suburban hipster dad. He's really excited about McDonald's new sirloin burger and this causes him to come out of retirement and go back to his first... Read More

The Plot To Crown A Ginger King

News | May 12, 2015, 3:18 pm

The Plot To Crown A Ginger King

It's a sad truth that in England, gingers are treated badly. I'm not sure why. I mean, they are just pasty white people with red hair, what's so scary about that. I have ginger friends that are afraid to travel to the UK for fear that they'll be ginger bashed. So, it comes as a bit of a surprise... Read More

Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: "Noah"

News | May 11, 2015, 10:48 am

Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: "Noah"

The title of this post is misleading. Normally in this column I discuss the abysmal crap that is on Netflix instant by talking about the best of the crap. The movies that although they aren't "good" movies by any stretch of the imagination, they are still entertaining or fun in some way. This movie... Read More