Heidi Klum Seems Super Practical

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Lex Jurgen - September 29, 2017

Heidi Klum recently called it quits with her younger New York art scene boyfriend, Vito Schnabel. In deference to his father being a lauded modern painter and arthouse filmmaker, everybody generously referred to son Vito as an art curator. Sort of like how you working your NFL Prime Ticket Red Zone magic makes you a sports curator.

There were a bunch of fake stories put out by Klum and to some extent Schnabel's people framing the breakup in a manner that seemed humane, yet entirely self-serving. None of them mentioned the fact that Schnabel was busted earlier this month at Burning Man for holding shrooms.

It's unclear what's more embarrassing. Being a lounge-about second-rate version of your famous old man. Attending Burning Man. Or being busted at a drug festival for drugs. The undercover cops nailed Schnabel on distribution charges to boot, which seems ridiculously on its face. Unless desperately trying to look cool by sharing your shrooms at Burning Man now makes you a major narcotics dealer.

None of this will stick beyond some kind of fine and community service, but it seems to have been enough to frighten off Heidi Klum, a mom of some number of Seal and other famous men's kids, with a massive millions mainstream commercial brand name.

Therein lies the sexist double standard. Just a couple years ago Vito's old man pumped a kid into his third baby mama, this time a Danish Victoria's Secret model half his age. Nobody said boo. But Heidi Klum can't be mounting a shroom dealing younger man or she risks losing deals. Come to think of it, that's not sexism. But still, let's call it that. It sounds better than rich people be fucking as they please.

Photo credit: Getty Images / TMZ

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