Gaming

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Tetris

News | May 1, 2013, 9:05 am

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Tetris

How many video games are such massive assholes that they have a medical malady named after them? Tetris, that’s how many. The nefarious ‘Tetris Syndrome,’ which sent those damn shapes cascading down our bloodshot eyelids (from the inside) long after our craptacular, chunky enough to serve as a... Read More

The Latest 'Grand Theft Auto V' Trailer Looks Better Than Most Movie Ads

News | April 30, 2013, 4:41 pm

The Latest 'Grand Theft Auto V' Trailer Looks Better Than Most Movie Ads

I found this trailer for Grand Theft Auto V to be much more entertaining that most action movie trailers. It too has cars, guns, and girls, but it also has compelling characters and a sense of humor. I know it's not really fair to compare any film to a video game, but comparing trailers between the two... Read More

Next Xbox Reveal Dated. Breath Bated. Black Market Organ-Purchasers Located

News | April 25, 2013, 9:12 am

Next Xbox Reveal Dated. Breath Bated. Black Market Organ-Purchasers Located

Well, maybe not that last bit. We could be optimistic and cross our fingers, toes, and balls that this thing won’t cost about as much as the entire national debt of Sub-Saharan Africa. But, as Grandpa Egotastic always told us (before we had to take him to that home because of his new getting his dick... Read More

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Asteroids

News | April 24, 2013, 9:20 am

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Asteroids

Last week, we brought you the ancient wonderment of Space Invaders. Here, then, is its equally decrepit brother-in-arcade-arms, Asteroids; another chunky enough to presumably withstand a direct hit from a ballistic missile fatass cabinet release from the Seventies. Because, lest we forget, this craptacular... Read More

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Space Invaders

News | April 17, 2013, 9:10 am

Forget Call of Duty, Real Men Need the Retro Love: Space Invaders

Huzzah! Alongside the lofty likes of Tetris, Asteroids and such, this is retro gaming. Space Invaders, which surfaced way, way back in the cloying sands of time (1978), was enjoyed/sprayed by errant beer-droplets in drinking establishments/sworn at upon game over screen by so many of us. Those endearing,... Read More

When TV Shows and Video Games Collide: The Walking Dead

News | April 15, 2013, 10:05 am

When TV Shows and Video Games Collide: The Walking Dead

As the dudely dudes of Egotastic! surely know, those damn zombies are continuing their marauding invasion of popular culture. Their appearances in every damn media in the cosmos have made them an integral part of 2013 society (remember that guy a few months ago who ate somebody’s face? Without his... Read More