Flap On, Flappy Bird

Remember those bastards who sold their iPhones on eBay for thousands of dollars, because Flappy Bird was installed? And the poor simpletons who bought them? Those are going to be some pretty pissed simpletons, right about now.

Yes indeed. Just when you thought it was safe to return to the App Store, Flappy-effing-Bird is returning. Destructoid reports that the game's creator has announced its glorious resurgence, and that it will be some time in August. He promises, purportedly, that:
"The new version will add multiplayer, and will be less addictive than the original."

Dong Nguyen himself previously stated that the Flappy Bird compulsion was the reason for its removal in the first place. Nevertheless, how in holy hell can it be made ‘less addictive' for the Flappy faithful? Perhaps a new function will send a mild electric shock through your balls whenever you fail. That'll reduce the one-more-go factor a little.

Still, if it helps to quell the tide of ballachingly bad clones of the game, we should all be thankful. Let's hope the original makes it back before the Justin Bieber-themed knock off appears. Y'know, Flappy Asshole.