Bikinis Posts:

Iris Kavka Bikinis Like A Pro And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Iris Kavka is spectacularly sexy in these bikini pics. (Hollywood Tuna)

Drya Michelle shows off some cleave and discusses sex life. (TMZ)

Jamie Lynn Sigler has a spectacular pair of paisans, if you know what I mean. (Drunken Stepfather)

Daniela Lopez Osorio is raising my heart rate in these sportswear pics. (Popoholic)

Chrissy Teigen forgets to wear a shirt and it's good. (The Superficial)

Cara Delevinge grabs her boobies to save your nuts. (COED)

Lisa Ann shows off funbags and shows off new boyfriend. (Busted Coverage)

Genevieve Morton Bikini Outtakes Are Nipple Poking Fun Times

Genevieve Morton simply has one of the finest bikini bodies on this planet. At least the parts that we've mapped as of yet. Body mapping is my specialty, you should see my protractor. Ahem. The point is, Genevieve Morton is the current toast of the bikini modeling world, having gotten her big SI break to become a much bigger name, face, and most definitely body in the world of two piece hot swimsuit pimping.

In these outtakes from Gavin Bond's bikini pictorial, and yes, outtakes are always better than intakes, Genevieve shows that even in her photos that didn't make it to press, damn, she is one outrageously sextastic nipple poking buxom vixen. I really do envy the sun for touching her with its rays. Though maybe a tad more envy toward her boyfriend who gets to touch her with more than just UV rays. Oh, to be the man who gets to ice down those headlights for photoshoots. Dare to dream the perfect job dream. So hot. Enjoy.

Michelle Lewin Bikini Bodily Faptastic Exhibition in Miami

If you're a fitness instructor to other hot bodied celebrity, why not advertise for your services by showing off your own results. Michelle Lewin couldn't do any better advertising thant exhibiting her stellar taut curves and eye-catching bikini body in Miami. Want to look like me? Hire me? Heck, if I were a woman looking to own half the world with my thong covered booty, I'd sign up yesterday. I'm not, so I'm just going to watch for free if it's all the same.

Miami Beach has become the single toughest locale for sextastic bikini body competition. You don't just show up with an okay body and expect to earn tickets redeemable for stuffed animals and paddle balls at the end of the day. There are serious models with seriously hard workouts and seriously outrageously hot bodies lining the sandy shores. This is the show. Come properly equipped or don't come at all. That probably seems harsh from a man who children point at and scream when he takes his shirt off at the public pool. But, what the hell. Michelle Lewin has raised the bar. Enjoy.

Miss Butt Brazil Model Indianara Carvalho Rocks A Bikini

Brazilian Miss Butt Indianara Carvalho showed off her, well, butt in these bikini pics in Paris. It goes without saying that Indianara has an outstanding booty. When you consider how great the booties in Brazil are and then realize that she was democratically voted as having the best butt in Brazil, that's saying something. It is pretty incredible. While she's in Paris they should take a bronze of her butt and put it in the Louvre. She's also covered topless in a couple of the pics and she's got some extraordinary funbags. They are some of those big 'ol floppies that I greatly enjoy. I like a pair of boobs that can knock you unconscious. That's just me, though.

You've got to love the French. They just let this girl take her top off in the middle of the incredibly busy park in front of the Eiffel Tower. There were no half naked Brazilian chicks when I was there. Just fat German tourists. I always miss the good stuff.

Abby Cubey Bikini Pictures Put Busty Filipina Lust in the Ocean Breeze

Whoa, be still my erratically beating ticker. The sight of pinay hottie Abby Cubey and her bodacious curves in a bikini is making me skip a few beats, though I assure you the blood flow seems to be working A-OK.

Abby is back for round two of Malibu seaside shoots with the creepy bottled water company that brings hotties out daily for half-nekkid shoots along the shoreline. That's not the creepy part. In fact, that's the best part. If anything is creepy it's what I'm imagining Abby and I doing in my basement of toys. Though I don't actually have a basement since I live in Los Angeles so we'd just have to pretend to be going down a flight of stairs while actually just entering the hall closet. It's worth it. My toy array is mighty impressive, some imported goods that had to bypass customs due to their possibly violating various Crimes Against Humanity laws coming out of the Hague. Abby, I'll be gentle. But when it's your turn, please promise to do the opposite. Enjoy.

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikinis It Up And Other Fine Things To Ogle

I never get tired of looking at Alessandra Ambrosio in a bikini. (Popoholic)

Sexy Tina Knowles rubs her butt against Jamie Foxx during a concert. (TMZ)

Daniela Giraldo is sexy as F for Mai Petit magazine. (Drunken Stepfather)

Another day, another Sofia Vergara cleavage show. (Hollywood Tuna)

Tori Spelling may be pregnant but she's still a hottie. (The Superficial)

Mariah Carrey shows off some leg in Shanghai. (Dlisted)

Jennifer Lawrence is seriously sexy in an Oscar De La Renta dress. (Huffington Post)

Colleen Shannon Bikini Crazy Hot Body Pimping the Pricey H20

Colleen Shannon is definitely on my list of hottest ex-cons ever. I'm sure she's glad her recent prison stint past for doing some wrong things with the wrong boyfriend is behind her. I'm certainly glad it is. A body like this Playmate has should never be kept behind lock and key. It needs to be free. Free to please me. And others, you can look too, as Colleen rolls about on the sandy shores of Malibu pimping the mysteriously creepy 138 bottled water.

Not that I didn't imagine some conjugal visits with an amped up and horny Colleen Shannon at the Women's Central Jail, I mean, even as I kept waiting in line at the visitor's center only to have her turn down my requests for such physical interaction once again, I was still dreaming. And just look at that slamming bikini body. If dreams aren't built off that, I'm not sure how dreams work. Colleen, I'm pleased you're on the outside once again so we can examine your outsides once again. And perhaps someday your insides. There go my dreams again. Enjoy.