Natalie Portman Wants a Nice Jewish Boy

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Natalie Portman is torn between her life as a Jew, and all those hot actor guys who aren't. According to The New York Post, Natalie thinks it's important to raise her children as Jews, but dating non-Jewish gays kinda gets in the way.

Take Gael Garcia Bernal, for instance. Good looking? Yes. Jewish? Nope. Then there's Jake Gyllenhaal. Good looking? Yes. Jewish? Yes. Okay, forget Jake Gyllenhaal. He's supposed to be gay anyways. The point is, I'm Jewish. So? No? Come on...

"A priority for me is definitely that I'd like to raise my kids Jewish, but the ultimate thing is to have someone who is a good person and who is a partner... I get much more Jewish in Israel."

But her father is still very much in touch with his roots - and he loves to make jokes at the expense of her gentile boyfriends. She adds, "He always makes this stupid joke with my new boyfriend, who is not Jewish. He says, 'It's just a simple operation.'"

Well, let's just hope Natalie Portman comes to her senses and chooses the right guy. Me. And let's hope she ditches Jakey-poo over there. Anyway, I hear they're just friends, and you know how hard it is to take it to the next level. And I don't think Jake buying Natalie flowers is going to cut it.