bill-swift - April 27, 2012
(Look, don't kill the messenger, it's not like I exactly control what goes on around here. There are the evil elves to contend with. And, no I don't mean mythological woodland humanoid creatures, I mean the short-stacked underaged A.D.D. kids from Myanmar we pay in Fun Dip candy packs who absolutely think underaged Courtney Stodden is the skanky bomb. I deny them their Courtney, all of a sudden my Facebook Mafia Wars account disappears. It's like that around here.)
Courtney Stodden, or as we like to think of her, Stephen King's Carrie with Fun Bags, hit the grocery story in her super tight dress and pushed up everything underneath, in order to shop for a couple essentials, essentials such as gawks, stares, and attention. Her grandpa/husband/stat rapist stood at her side, carrying the heavier items such as guilt, shame, and awkwardness. It was another Courtney Stodden moment, we share with you, and please our angry elves. Enjoy.